pennycandy

I have felt like I've been held at knife point for the past two weeks. I have been screaming for relief. Even in the form of being stabbed, it would better than just being held in that terrible limbo.

Now that it is here, I don't know what to do. I feel like everything has to change, but how?

I don't know what to do,...
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"Your new profile picture is pretty." He told me last night on the phone.

".................Thank you." I reply, weepy and sad.

"....You're always pretty though, aren't you?"

I burst into tears and say "No...." My voice completely consumed with sadness.

I can hear the emotion in his voice as he says "Why are you crying? Don't be sad, there is enough sad going around. You...
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god, I miss my Mikey like crazy.

I haven't seen him, or heard more than a few words from him since Sunday. I can't say anything though, because he needs to be with his dad and family. I want him to be with them, but I'm getting really depressed. I don't know if I can wait til Friday or, worse yet, Saturday to see him...
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Greg hasn't talked to me in while. He's one of the fellas on second at work. He's very preverted, extremely loud and funny as fuck.

He came to see me today. He and Cazz had me cornered in a gauge (yeah, it is for a part that is eight and half feet long, so it is a huge gauge). I kept backing up 'til I...
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HELLO!!!!!

Damn, I'm really happy, even though I'm about to do some crazy shit that is going to fuck up my whole life as I've known it for.....oh, right around six/seven months now........I'm kind of nervous, a little worried.

It really shouldn't matter, because not one damn thing is changing, except, what, six letters?

No big thing.....I just need to go through with it. My...
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Some guy tried to pick me up tonight in the skeeziest way ever. I'm kind of pissed right now.

I used to know him, he's one of my friend's consins. I was taking her to the bar, since she had been drinking, he asked if I could drop him and his friend off as well. Okay, I have no problem doing that. So we get...
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So, my boyfriend told me I'm a man with boobs and a vigania today.
I must say I agree. lol I've never been the most ladylike, and the only "girly" things I can't live with out are dancing and shopping; I can live in old dirty clothes, I often go without make-up, rarely wear dresses or heels, own but one purse (and only because it...
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I can't get my tattoo Not this weekend. On a prescription.......grrrrrrrrr.
Lots of shit has been going down, and not one lick of it is good.

Hi.

I'm getting my last name tattooed down my backbone in Hungarian ruins this weekend. SWEET! Later I'm getting a huge butternut tree as a backpiece, well, from a little below my shoulder blades to the top of my bottom....tehe! Can't wait.

Holy hell. I am going to fucking scream.

What can I do? Not a damn thing, and I think I'm getting over it. Then, it just hits me every so often.

Am I that bad? Am I fucking despisable? Destructive to others? I don't get it.

I'm okay with me, it isn't me. Its how others get the wrong impression......it is crushing ribs....or my heart...
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