pelafina

I read a journal I kept from december 98 to may 99.
It breaks my heart a bit. It makes me miss justin baade an awful lot.
And through reflection I see so many things.
Wow. To be young and slightly jadded.

Justin B Baade you fuck head, get off whatever it is that seperates us,
and call me. Sweet Lucifer, its been to long.

I know you don't come here anymore. I know, I know, I know. (Have I told
you my nails are always purple these days?) But... but... but... I wish
you were still around to sew me up again.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for the letters. I'm sorry that I didn't say a lot of things
when I should have. I'm sorry I didn't make the decisions I wanted to.
Mostly I'm sorry that things got here.

And pathetic me still scratches arround for the hope that we will still
bump into eachother in that airport. Ill notice your warehouse eyes,
you'll see my feet at the sea.

My gates are empty these days without you.
And I miss you like stars and blood and words.

Give me one more bottle of wine.
You, me, and five bucks?


Oh.... my stupid heart keeps sliding on my wirst damn it. Its just hard
to see through my peacock feathers.

I miss you.
*n