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peeshypunk

Topsfield, MA

Member Since 2002

Followers 5 Following 5

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Saturday Jun 15, 2002

Jun 15, 2002
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OK, first thing first: I am not a fan of censorship. I own't go into a rant about how wrong it is because I'll bet 99% of you would agree and the only thing that bugs me more than censorship is people going on like a broken record about it.
With that said, I work in a retail video store. I don't sell R-rated movies to kids. Flat out. It's not that I don't think they're old enough, or I'l just playing to the MPAA, but I don't want to deal with the angry parent (99% of the time it's the mom) yelling at me for selling them god-knows-what. There are exceptions. We have a couple of regulars who are like 15-16 and good kids and, depending on the content of the film, I'll ask them if I'm gonna get in trouble for selling it to them. If they say "No, it's cool", I'll hook em up.
OK, so today's the day before Father's Day. Lotsa 15 year olds buying Black Hawk Down, Saving Private Ryan, that sorta shit. Knowing it's present stuff, I sell em. So this little kid, probably about 13 whose balls I'll guarantee haven't even dropped yet wants to buy the South Park movie. Even for a person like me who's not a fan of the show, I thought the movie was genius but if any flicks gonna get a parent screaming, it's this one. My feeling is, if you're watching it and not understanding the clitoris jokes, you're too young to be watching it. Or a damned, lonely fool.
Anyway, I tell the kid I can't sell it to him unless a parent's with him. He asks why. I say because I'm not getting the fucking parental thunder struck down on me for him. He retorts with "Oh, she don't mind". I say, "Well, I don't know that, and I can't risk it. If you bring in a parent, though, no problem." He then slides the DVD across the counter, angrily yells "Fuck you!!" and just stands there as if waiting for me to say " 'Fuck me'? Oh, well, in that case, let me get you a bag an-Oh! Put away your wallet, sir. This'n's on the house!" After our 5-second standoff, he storms out. Probably to cry.
So the next person in line, a bitter-looking fortysomething career-woman type with a cell phone, comes to the counter. I take the South Park movie from the counter and say "Wow. That was unpleasant, huh?" She, without even looking up says "Don't even drag me into your bullshit." Flawless as a damned Swiss watch.
On a cheerier note, when the aging Ally McBeal with the phallic cell phone turned her head, I rubbed her debit card on the magnetic security deactivator thingy. Good look on the ATM, ma'am.
complainey:
i'd just like to say...YOU RULE! good move on that deactivating her atm card.
Jun 15, 2002
gimmesatisfaction:
Sometimes the only thing that makes retail jobs redeemable is the great stories we get to tell about them later.
Jun 15, 2002

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