peche_____

Well... If I had a choice, everything in life would be trade able instead of payable.

No money.

But what if you don't have or make anything that's worth trading? Be a peasant again?

Grow crops in your backyard or on the banister or something?

Eat your own lettuce?

Well. If it keeps me away from the office, I'd grow my own crops. I just realized I REALLY don't want to spend my time like this. I let those people pay me some money for my precious time. But what else is there?

What can I do to avoid this and still be happy, well fed, feeds my son and keeps me out of a crop field or prostitution or worse?

I don't know.

I always wanted to be poet or painter, but you can't create that kind of inspiration, it's either there or it's not.

And in my case: It's not there.

Maybe I'm lazy, going back to the office every other day for at least 8 hours. Is this the result of the mind of a lazy person?

Or am I the opposite, very persistent, to continue this torture for four years?

I think the later. Sheer persistency is what I am displaying every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. To be around these friggin' morons all day, to do my own job PLUS at least three other jobs of the lazy bastards over there who don't know a computer from an oak tree, to keep my cool and explain for the FIVEHUNDREDMILLIONTH time why, when and how something works and should be done.

If you'd keep track of what I do all day and how little the others do at the office, I'd get all their salaries and a bonus, a nice car, a phone and a year off to go to the next tropical island.

And still my boss constantly wonders why I am so tense.

I am a fulltime mother; I keep a part time job which drives me absofuckinglutely crazy; I have all these creative feelings which I cannot put to paper or canvas, I am growing larger by the week from all the potato chips and chocolate bars and I have constant headaches.

And I couldn't be happier.



xPeche