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peanut85

South San Jose, CA

Member Since 2002

Followers 63 Following 120

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Sunday May 27, 2007

May 27, 2007
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Dreams.

Well, Dream, rather.

Had a good one last night. Met a girl. Knocked me of my feet. Somehow I knew in that dream that I was flat out in love with her. Immediately. She was beautiful, with that European look and the aura of, well, someone in real life I never thought really existed. Drop dead gorgeous, smart, funny, talkable, and well, everything else I look for? No, no such thing. Short, curly brown hair. Slightly darker skin. Perfect big brown eyes that join in with the smile in making my heart literally sweat. A smile that makes me want to hold on forever and never let go. The perfect girl? Quite frankly, yes. (And yes, she looked familiar)

Well, then it happened . (Remember, this is MY dream and it can get as weird as I want it to.) I then got in some sort of fight or argument, and killed a guy. But wait It wasn't a guy. It was a robot. And so was I. (Told you it got weird) I avoided the law as long as I could, trying to find my dream girl again, but my searches were failing. I did see her a couple of times, but not for long. And each time I did I would have to run away to avoid Johnny Law. So, I finally turned myself in. The interview about the murder was in some sort of outdoor caf, the kind you see in Europe. In the interview, I was basically on trail. I managed to prove that since I wrote down something using fractions instead of whole numbers with decimal places that I was indeed not a robot, since robots can only think and write in decimal places, not fractions. (Yeah, shut up, I know it's weird)

So, then it was time to find her. And I did. I snuck up on her and her friends at a restaurant/bar type place and when I presented myself, she smiled. The greatest smile in the world. The kind that simply makes your heart skip. Really, it actually skips. She wriggled her way out of the booth, hugged me, and I began to explain. I told her that it was all over, I was innocent. We could be together with no qualms forever. We kissed. I woke up.

Greatest. Dream. Ever.

You know, besides the robot part thing


What did t mean? Hmmmm. Ideas:

The girl: Rather clearly, it was Asia. I know I will probably never see her again, even if I do move down to So Cal. For some reason, I just can't get her out of my head. Everything I noticed about her in those few hours at the wedding is still as lucid and immediate as it was as it happened. Her, eyes, smile, face, even her damn feet I have locked as a snapshot in my mind. It's both depressing and exciting that I will never see her again. Depressing because she was this perfect girl, even in such a short time, she blew me away. I have not been the same since. She wasn't supposed to exist. She was supposed to remain a figment in my imagination. Now my world has been flipped. The perfect girl? Really? In real life?

I was a robot/running from the law: I'm not comfortable in my current situation, and I'm searching for a way out. I continually run scenarios through my head of different things I want to move on to. For a while it was Europe. Now it's So Cal. Anywhere it is, I want a fresh start. Everything new. Reborn.

I was found innocent and got the girl: Usually I wake up before the happy ending, so this is a good one. Does this mean that my sought after change is possible? If work at it, I can do it? Well, I hope so. I just wish it meant I could see a certain woman again. Even if it didn't mean we hooked up, fell in love, spent the rest of our lives together, any of that. I just want to see her again. Just talk to her. She made my soul smile.

So what does this all mean? Is this one of those signs that it is time to move on? Time to get out of the Bay Area? I made the decision a long time ago that I was a city boy, always attracted to the bigger cities. I need mountains or hills, an ocean nearby would be nice, and there needs to be a plethora of shit to do, day or night. Staying in Cali would be nice, so I really think it's time to take the jump down to So Cal. Now How do I go about initiating that conversation? Or that one

Or was it just a silly dream?

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