pb

tonight's deluded miseries, the first brand new, scraped from my mind---still warm and shivering. the other two old, dessicated, nearly forgotten.

headed home to TX for a few days. may not be updating, so i'll leave you with these words of misanthrope wisdom.

-pb







don't come near me with those hips, that skin, your smoooooth scent.

i hope your lithe fingertips tangle in that jet black, oh-so sexy hair. ye gods, that hair; don't let it fucking turn me red as it falls across those cherubic cheeks.

don't clamp that full lip so very gently between predator's teeth; lick my blood from razor edges.

don't look askance at me, first coy then hardened and aloof. your eyes are icy fascination, cold as hailstones and just as hard. those hailstones, those windows, they show only twin succubi souls.

don't speak don't smile don't sigh don't cry

i can't abide it.

take your curves and walk them away from where i spin; swish and sway your feminine wiles until you become perfect memory.

torn and spent and desolate and haunted

just leave me be. just like you found me, prone, prostrate...just...lying here, glad to have fallen off that damned roller-coaster; staring the iron in its single eye and singing requiems for an idealistic innocence long since forgotten.

i love you. i hate you. fuck off. please don't go. watch me kill it away and at least fake those tears, like personal saltwater rubbed into my rended flesh. just for me.

just for me.

just for me.













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and, from about a month ago...just because i'm feeling it tonight like no other:




beast


in your belly
you beast
you've eaten me
sucked down my lonely screams
with the delight of a cannibal whore

like a starving madwoman
you push and pull and suck and rend
your blood boils and steams
with ebony lust

rake me, break me
try harder
whisper terrible things

frantic, slip off the skin
in long, red trails of pain
swallow my breath and make it poison,
exhale back into my virgin breast

control, seize, torture and tease
i want your malevolence inside me
strangle me with promises
be my ruiner


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and from even further back:





the missing

we both we've gone missing, missing...
somehow missed each other in time and space
but not calling, never this
that we have and share in spades, this calling
isn't missing, never missing
always torturing, nurturing, bleeding like the barber's leeches
it tastes like lust, this lifework, this lifeline
like shed blood on a lover's tongue

we both we've gone missing, kissing solitude...
somehow kissed this phantom other in time and space
share this pain, always that
which we share and bear, this affliction
isn't missing, always kissing
always sucking, fucking, draining like a dead infidelity
it scents of desperation, this art, this avocation
like a luscious hole in a lover's soul