from the Drunks group:
how about Red Bull and Vodka?
well, i'll fuckin' tell you about fuckin' Red Bull and Vodka.
fuuuuck that. its almost as bad as mixing bubblegum and fucking drinking and calling it schnapps.
cut to last year when pb was unfortunately living with the gfriend.
pb, gfriend, and gfriend's best friend go out drinking. many, many drinks are had. pb drinks lots and lots of beer. gfriend and gfriend's best friend do Red Bull and Vodkas all night. pb gets drunk and broke pretty quick,
go home. somehow on the way gfriend gets it in her head that pb likes gfriend's best friend. this is preposterous as the best friend looks alarmingly akin to a troll looking for a bridge to live under, even after about a dozen beerz.
cut to bedtime. pb is vewy sweeepy. gfriend is moaning and bitching about how pb wants to leave her for the troll, to go live under the bridge apparently. pb kindly tells gfriend she's drunk and not making any sense and should really stop puking so he can stop holding her hair and go to bed. gfriend continues to moan and whine about how pb is a bastard for being in love with the troll, then is angry for having to puke again, even though pb is obviously being a sweetheart and doing the holding hair thing.
cut to sunrise on sunday morning. pb is lying in bed, more miserable than any man who was once drunk but is now so annoyed and trapped that he's stone cold sober has a right to be. gfriend is lying on the floor, naked after puking on 2 sets of pajamas and crying because she can't sleep because she fucking DRANK RED BULL AND VODKA ALL FUCKING NIGHT and her crazy notions about her sweetheart, awesome, live-in boyfriend running off with the troll to make troll-pb babies just won't fucking stop. it keeps going and going and going and going....
pb goes to sleep in his SUV because the girl won't shut up about trollbabies and the troll is now living under the couch.
that was over a year ago. the girl is long gone (and i don't own a couch or a bridge for obvious reasons) i still shudder upon seeing a Red Bull commerical.
FUCK RED BULL AND DRINKING
-pb
music:
book: the redemption of althalus, david and leigh eddings
how about Red Bull and Vodka?
well, i'll fuckin' tell you about fuckin' Red Bull and Vodka.
fuuuuck that. its almost as bad as mixing bubblegum and fucking drinking and calling it schnapps.
cut to last year when pb was unfortunately living with the gfriend.
pb, gfriend, and gfriend's best friend go out drinking. many, many drinks are had. pb drinks lots and lots of beer. gfriend and gfriend's best friend do Red Bull and Vodkas all night. pb gets drunk and broke pretty quick,
go home. somehow on the way gfriend gets it in her head that pb likes gfriend's best friend. this is preposterous as the best friend looks alarmingly akin to a troll looking for a bridge to live under, even after about a dozen beerz.
cut to bedtime. pb is vewy sweeepy. gfriend is moaning and bitching about how pb wants to leave her for the troll, to go live under the bridge apparently. pb kindly tells gfriend she's drunk and not making any sense and should really stop puking so he can stop holding her hair and go to bed. gfriend continues to moan and whine about how pb is a bastard for being in love with the troll, then is angry for having to puke again, even though pb is obviously being a sweetheart and doing the holding hair thing.
cut to sunrise on sunday morning. pb is lying in bed, more miserable than any man who was once drunk but is now so annoyed and trapped that he's stone cold sober has a right to be. gfriend is lying on the floor, naked after puking on 2 sets of pajamas and crying because she can't sleep because she fucking DRANK RED BULL AND VODKA ALL FUCKING NIGHT and her crazy notions about her sweetheart, awesome, live-in boyfriend running off with the troll to make troll-pb babies just won't fucking stop. it keeps going and going and going and going....
pb goes to sleep in his SUV because the girl won't shut up about trollbabies and the troll is now living under the couch.
that was over a year ago. the girl is long gone (and i don't own a couch or a bridge for obvious reasons) i still shudder upon seeing a Red Bull commerical.
FUCK RED BULL AND DRINKING
-pb
music:
book: the redemption of althalus, david and leigh eddings
VIEW 25 of 28 COMMENTS
Anyway, in words - the gap troll lives under stairs and bridges, throws hexes around when gap shoppers cannot answer its questions, and is generally extremely unpleasant looking and smelling. As well, I believe the gap troll is hermaphroditic so I guess you might have to be bi to date it or something.
Red bull sucks.
- crushjunkie -