paullieboy

Thursday is my birthday. I hope I'll have fun but I'm depressed about being alone right now. I recently had a break-up and it's killing me. I have a lot of great friends to keep me company but for some reason last night I couldn't get ahold of anyone. I felt so lonely. Then after going out to get dinner a friend calls and wants to do mushrooms. I did and it was fun but at one point I didn't want to be in my head or body because my brain was thinking some crazy shot that I couldn't, or didn't want to, handle. Now I'm home on my day off with nothing to do and it's raining so no biking anywhere. I got soaked riding my bike home earlier from my friends house. I don't drive a car, only bike. My friend just started bartending at a titty bar and so I might go see her and have a beer and cheer myself up with some boobies. I hope my birthday party goes well. I don't think my sgfl group likes me very much or is interested at all about my birthday party but oh well. I think it's going to be fun and I hope I can keep it together until then. So much is going on in my head and I just want it to stop.