Day 3 of this journal thing - I'm trying to get in the habit of writing these, and repetition is good for that. That's my moment of Shaolin wisdom. Hey, after 8 years of study, I suppose I should apply it to something besides hitting things.
Anyway, this morning I was thinking about the house I almost bought, but didn't. It was a thing of beauty, that house, 100 years old, 2 stories, with a spiral staircase, hardwood floors, and a clawfoot bathtub on the 2nd floor.
It was only 8,000 more than the house I own now, but probably twice the size. We didn't buy it because we were young, and afraid to make the offer we thought we could afford.
In the end though, we should have, because I know they would have accepted it, and we'd have had a beautiful home for the same price we paid for this one - which I love for the memories made here, but which isn't really all that nice.
But that was the story of me for a lot of years. Not taking the final step to get what I really wanted, letting fear of dissappointment hold me back. It took a long time to realize that it's better to reach for what you really want, and fail to get it, than it is to live a lifetime of what-if.
I guess it's a small miracle that I really pursued my wife when we first met. But then, I guess there are some things so good, so obviously necessary to your happiness, that you can't even conceive of not going chasing them.
In case anyone's wondering what brought this on: my neighbor across the street is selling lawn gnomes, and other shitty little decorations. She also, I'm fairly sure, just hit a line of coke on the front porch, sucking it right off a folding table. That's pretty much par for the course over there, and it made me wonder what might have been.
Constant mood =
, the prehensile wrestler.
Anyway, this morning I was thinking about the house I almost bought, but didn't. It was a thing of beauty, that house, 100 years old, 2 stories, with a spiral staircase, hardwood floors, and a clawfoot bathtub on the 2nd floor.
It was only 8,000 more than the house I own now, but probably twice the size. We didn't buy it because we were young, and afraid to make the offer we thought we could afford.
In the end though, we should have, because I know they would have accepted it, and we'd have had a beautiful home for the same price we paid for this one - which I love for the memories made here, but which isn't really all that nice.
But that was the story of me for a lot of years. Not taking the final step to get what I really wanted, letting fear of dissappointment hold me back. It took a long time to realize that it's better to reach for what you really want, and fail to get it, than it is to live a lifetime of what-if.
I guess it's a small miracle that I really pursued my wife when we first met. But then, I guess there are some things so good, so obviously necessary to your happiness, that you can't even conceive of not going chasing them.
In case anyone's wondering what brought this on: my neighbor across the street is selling lawn gnomes, and other shitty little decorations. She also, I'm fairly sure, just hit a line of coke on the front porch, sucking it right off a folding table. That's pretty much par for the course over there, and it made me wonder what might have been.
Constant mood =
, the prehensile wrestler. VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
I'm not a "serious" writer - yet. But it's definitely something I do as a hobby, and hope to one day publish something. i have indeed heard of RPGs, and I can proudly say that one summer, long, long ago, my mom, in a last-ditch effort to send me away for the summer, sent me to a Dungeons and Dragons summer camp. Now if that isn't the epitome of dorkiness, I don't know what is.
I know how hard it is to even get your foot in the door at some of these publishing houses. I seriously think they base their decisions on things like throwing darts, or i don't know, pin the tail on the donkey. "Yes, I believe we will accept...this one! It has shallow characters, a boring plot, and could be mistaken for a cliche dictionary... but gosh darnit, the donkey tail told me to."
And I loved the Earthsea series too. I haven't read it in a long while. I'm also a fan of Anne McCaffrey.
And I'm actually familiar with a few publishing websites - erotica and others. When I found them I thought it was a cool concept, but I was disappointed with the calibre of writing... which, in retrospect shouldn't have surprised me that much. But hey, if the money's there...
I also read a lot of AM's older stuff, haven't read anything recent. But I absolutely loved (and I think it's in my profile) the Crystal Singer series. I found it such a fascinating concept. If you're in the mood, you should take a look.
I took a Sci-Fi English class in University. It was interesting since the reading list was diverse enough to hold my attention. We read a Le Guin book, The Left Side Of Darkness. I didn't like it. I was very disappointed.