paradogmatic

Wow did I ever just have a spontaneous cathartic moment - I just posted this in Grayces' journal and I feel good about it for some reason - never really told anyone the following story before ( nb - it concerns items that have associated memories ) :


The strangest item I have is basically one of those signs they put on top of a for-sale sign to say its 'Sold' .. there's a long story behind this and I think I'll inflict it upon you wink

On the night of my high-school graduation dance / dinner ( a 'couple' years ago ), I ended up meeting for the first time this girl, who was the 'date' of a friend of mine. As the night progressed, her and I gravitated towards talking the most and the others were less and less involved.

Upon being tossed out of the house where we were having the after party party, the plan became that the majority of the senior class was to walk all the way to the top of the Mountain here in Montreal and meet up there.

So Siobhan, myself and her date Brendon and another friend of mine Sasha all head off. This was an early spring night, about 2 am, so things had gotten somewhat chilly - we stopped off at my house which was in walking distance for some extra sweaters etc and then started making our way through our neighbourhood. As we wandered up one street, Siobhan and I got the idea that it would be particularly fun to steal Vendu ( Sold ) signs because then people would start getting calls about their houses again - admittedly sort of funny even now, and relatively harmless.

We never made it to the Mountain that night, instead ending up on the forested lawn of Siobhan's school - a private school along the way to the mountain. And here's the funny part - that point is the first time in my life I really ever fell in love with someone. We were both sitting in the misty night, leaning up against the trees. The others were there ( At this point it had been discovered that Brendon and her were simply friends and not dating ).

And so the tragedy of this all strikes - looking back on it now a bit more wise, I realise that we both felt similarly - in at least that there was attraction. We were sitting there, in the quiet night ( the other two had just disappeared ) and it was the time to kiss her - but me being so unaware, I didn't quite catch on .. and soon enough that 'moment' was gone. But wait - it gets worse wink

I was so paranoid later that week that Brendon would freak out, that it took me nearly the whole week to simply get the courage to get her number from him. And even then, I couldn't pick up the phone ..

And the poignant reminder ? Well here's the thing.. I didn't keep a sign that night - so its not a sign from that night that I have .. its the sign she left on my porch one day with a note written to me in lip-liner stick saying to the effect, "Hi - was in the neigbourhood and I thought I'd let you know I was here.."

Afterwards, I tried to get into contact with her ( much later ) -- but I never actually saw her again ..

So - what does the sign remind me to do? To not be so afraid of things, as you may very well let something good just slip away through inaction ...


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