So, maybe I should explain the rules of Blind Mans Buff. I didnt initially because they involve a very long and boring back story, although maybe its just as funny.
One of my flatmates is a very strange guy. He initially appears a very amiable and gentle soul and indeed he is the one flatmate I get on best with. However when it comes to his frankly Victorian attitudes to women, sex, and homosexuality he is hilarious. The particular comment which first alerted me to his peculiarities went something like this:
Oh, Ive got nothing against gays, Im sure some of them are very nice, I just dont particularly want to get to know any of them. Of course lesbians are fine, so long as they let me watch.
I cracked up so badly I strained my sides, I dont think he quite realised what I was laughing at.
Maybe I shouldnt find him so funny but I think its because his views are so diametrically opposed to mine that i imagine his world view must be so insane it is unimaginable. I cannot begin to think what it would be like to be in his head.
Probably his way of thinking is still very common, but I just cannot countenance it.
Im getting away from the point but I just wanted to show what kind of a guy he is.
So, one time he caught myself and my girlfriend post-coital. It wasnt particularly embarrassing, we were both decent. Afterwards we were joking about it and he made the peculiar comment:
Yeah, I often give my ex[-girlfriend] a poke She says it really fucks with her head so Im trying to stop.
Sheer insanity I thought.
Thus the verb to poke passed into my vocabulary and I passed it on to my girlfriend and now we often use it when we are joking around about sex.
Anyway, last night she said we should make a game out of the word, and the game went like this:
Blind Mans Buff: A Game for two players
(unfortunately this game works best for a heterosexual couple)
1: Both strip naked.
2: Indulge in as much foreplay as you want.
3: The woman should blindfold the man while he stands at the end of the bed (I suggest that you use a proper blindfold which doesnt obstruct breathing)
4: An erection is necessary
5: The woman lies down on the bed and tells the man he may begin.
6: The man must now attempt to poke the woman with his willy, he scores points if he hits one of the three score zones.
7: The man may not use his hands (tying is optional)
8: The woman should shout Cold, Colder, Warm, Hot, Hotter, etc) as appropriate
9: To make things more fun the woman is allowed to move as much as possible, however she should not deliberately obstruct more than one of the score zones at once.
10: Cries of pain after a wrongful poking are to be heeded.
11: Have fun.
One of my flatmates is a very strange guy. He initially appears a very amiable and gentle soul and indeed he is the one flatmate I get on best with. However when it comes to his frankly Victorian attitudes to women, sex, and homosexuality he is hilarious. The particular comment which first alerted me to his peculiarities went something like this:
Oh, Ive got nothing against gays, Im sure some of them are very nice, I just dont particularly want to get to know any of them. Of course lesbians are fine, so long as they let me watch.
I cracked up so badly I strained my sides, I dont think he quite realised what I was laughing at.
Maybe I shouldnt find him so funny but I think its because his views are so diametrically opposed to mine that i imagine his world view must be so insane it is unimaginable. I cannot begin to think what it would be like to be in his head.
Probably his way of thinking is still very common, but I just cannot countenance it.
Im getting away from the point but I just wanted to show what kind of a guy he is.
So, one time he caught myself and my girlfriend post-coital. It wasnt particularly embarrassing, we were both decent. Afterwards we were joking about it and he made the peculiar comment:
Yeah, I often give my ex[-girlfriend] a poke She says it really fucks with her head so Im trying to stop.
Sheer insanity I thought.
Thus the verb to poke passed into my vocabulary and I passed it on to my girlfriend and now we often use it when we are joking around about sex.
Anyway, last night she said we should make a game out of the word, and the game went like this:
Blind Mans Buff: A Game for two players
(unfortunately this game works best for a heterosexual couple)
1: Both strip naked.
2: Indulge in as much foreplay as you want.
3: The woman should blindfold the man while he stands at the end of the bed (I suggest that you use a proper blindfold which doesnt obstruct breathing)
4: An erection is necessary
5: The woman lies down on the bed and tells the man he may begin.
6: The man must now attempt to poke the woman with his willy, he scores points if he hits one of the three score zones.
7: The man may not use his hands (tying is optional)
8: The woman should shout Cold, Colder, Warm, Hot, Hotter, etc) as appropriate
9: To make things more fun the woman is allowed to move as much as possible, however she should not deliberately obstruct more than one of the score zones at once.
10: Cries of pain after a wrongful poking are to be heeded.
11: Have fun.