panda_pewp

Well it's been about a week since my surgery and I hate to say this but there really hasn't been much change in my urgency or frequency. I'm also still getting up in the middle of the night a lot to use the bathroom. So the surgery was a complete bust. I'm really upset about it. I need a break from the pain and to sleep. Not to mention the other crap I have going on right now. My lovely mother decided to pop up at the most perfect time............ I never though I'd be able to hate my own family. But I hate her. I hate the way she makes me feel. I cannot continue to let her hurt me anymore. I told her to leave me alone. Then she gave my phone number out to a woman that was a social worker at this group home I was in as a young teen. I was there because my mom was "tired" of taking care of me and wanted to party more. I need to find a place to move into by the 1st of June. Andy is going out of town this week. I'm not sure how I'm emotionally handling that. I know I'll miss him. Not that we're living together anymore and I see him everyday. But just knowing he won't be 20 minutes down the street is anxiety inducing.


I JUST WANT A FUCKING BREAK DAMNIT!