Christmas is coming and I'm not really that excited about it. I know I should be because it's Livvi's first Christmas. But we don't have a tree or money to buy one. No present money. I'm terribly depressed. I know that her Grandparents are going to get her presents. To me it's not the same. I wanted to be able to give my little girl a great first Christmas.
ElizaDolittle fancied up some pictures for me to print out for my father in law. I also got some printed out for my mother in law. So at least I got some kind of present for them.

Since I became pregnant I have been trying to find my biological father. I got the help of my friend who lives in my hometown in Illinois. She found him! After 10 years I finally got to speak with my father. I also got in contact with my Uncle and Aunt. I miss my family dearly. With the holidays in full throttle I miss them even more. I was hoping to take Livvi to meet them sometime soon. But that isn't happening anytime soon.

My holidays are full of fail this year.