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pajamamama

Brookhaven

Member Since 2006

Followers 41 Following 48

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Thursday Nov 30, 2006

Nov 29, 2006
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frown

why do I only believe 10 percent of what I hear?
why do I believe everyone has a hidden agenda?
why do I believe that anyone who says I love you will leave someday?
why do I believe I love you is SO much more then words? Dont you? Its smiles and intamacy...and hugs and kisses...and the wanting to be there for the other person...it is not words!
why do I search for approval only to be afraid of it?
why I am afraid to let anyone in?
why do I think so much?
why can't I put faith into the unknown? I used to do it all the time...
why can't I be a video game character so if I fall off a cliff I can start all over again...I think if I had a second chance at life I would do it the right way next time.
why did I make the choices I have made? The only right one I have ever made was having my children.
why am I such a mess??????????????????

someone get a bat and hit me on the head and give me amnesia...thats close enough to starting over.

So I have this song I want to add but I can't find the video to go with it. So, here is the song to some movie...



It would be so much easier to move forward if you could just except and get over things...and forget the past....
VIEW 25 of 30 COMMENTS
blood_elf_mohawk:
Saveme. What happened? Is everything OK? I'm sorry I missed you on messenger (again). I just got back. For right now, know that I AM thinking about you a lot and I hope you're doing alright. Email me or message me and I will get back to you. Miss you.
Nov 30, 2006
dannydmc:

Sorry to hear like things went down; or at least that you're not feeling good right now frown I can sympathize. I have a tendency of getting really down on myself, especially when things start getting rough. Let me add to your list (well, with things that relate to me..so its not really YOUR list, irs more like my list but umm...you know)

Why do I refuse to listen to other people's advice
Why am I so sure that no one can really know me, or know whats good for me
Why do I always shoot my mouth off; saying the wrong thing at the wrong time
Why don't I ever seen happy doing what I'm doing
Why do isolate myself even further when I'm feeling depressed
Why the hell do I seem to get depressed easier than most people
Why is it that, despite being a fairly well adjusted young adult, I am continually convinced that I don't fit in; you'd think scars from High School would have healed after 6 years.

GAH!

Oh well, its actually been a pretty good day lately; although I almost got CO poisoning a few days ago *grrrr* smile
Nov 30, 2006

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