Odd things happen sometimes.
A few months ago when I got back in touch with my friend Wayne(he got kicked ou of his house in high school and had to move across the country to live with his mom) we decided to go out to some bars one night. Well I am very anti-social and dont do well around people i dont know(let alone girls) so when Wayne goes outside to smoke and a chick starts hitting on me I was pretty uncomfortable. Here is proof:
Peepee girl: Do you play pool?
Me: .......no
Peepee girl: Can i buy you a drink?
Me: I dont drink alcohol, im Straight Edge.
Peepee girl: Well Im trying really hard here, will you play pool with me?
Me: i guess......
I will get to why i refer to her as Peepee girl in a few minutes.
Smooth huh? well we played a few games(I let her win most of them. All she wanted was someone to take her home and bang her for an hour......she picked the wrong guy i guess.
Wayne comes back in and while Peepee goes to the bathroom he is a broken record of "take this bitch home", "shes begging for it" and my favorite "if you dont fuck her Ill tell people your gay".
We decide to go to a different place because Wayne wants pizza. So we have been all together about an hour and a half now just talking when Wayne says he has to go to the bathroom. He doesnt know where it is so Peepee girl says she will show him. While they are in there, he is peeing and she is doing her make-up, he gets done and washes his hands but turns around to see her facing him squating in the urinal.......WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! Now I know some people are comfortable peeing in front of other people, but a girl peeing spead legged in front of a guy she has known an hour? whoa.
After he comes back he decides its a bad idea for me to hook it up("told you so" i said). Wayne gets a call from a chick he knows and in no time we are joined by 2 other girls.....girs OUR age.
I guess I should explain now that this girl wasnt OLD, but she was old enough that i could guess she had a couple kids at home(she said she thought I was AT LEAST 30.....thanks). and she was actually pretty good looking, why was she after me?
So Peepee girl starts getting jealous that we are paying more attention to the new girls and takes me by the hand into the other room of the resteraunt and just hugs me.......then she is swaying so I figure she is really drunk, till i realize she is trying to get me to dance.
I dont dance.
It takes this girl like 5 songs to realize it is pointless for her to try this. She runs out the door and leaves, and is now just a story me any wayne tell to laugh a little.
Untill today when him and his now girlfriend were out eating and Peepee girl is managing the place. They are still eating and I havnt got any updates as to wether or not she recognizes him.
A few months ago when I got back in touch with my friend Wayne(he got kicked ou of his house in high school and had to move across the country to live with his mom) we decided to go out to some bars one night. Well I am very anti-social and dont do well around people i dont know(let alone girls) so when Wayne goes outside to smoke and a chick starts hitting on me I was pretty uncomfortable. Here is proof:
Peepee girl: Do you play pool?
Me: .......no
Peepee girl: Can i buy you a drink?
Me: I dont drink alcohol, im Straight Edge.
Peepee girl: Well Im trying really hard here, will you play pool with me?
Me: i guess......
I will get to why i refer to her as Peepee girl in a few minutes.
Smooth huh? well we played a few games(I let her win most of them. All she wanted was someone to take her home and bang her for an hour......she picked the wrong guy i guess.
Wayne comes back in and while Peepee goes to the bathroom he is a broken record of "take this bitch home", "shes begging for it" and my favorite "if you dont fuck her Ill tell people your gay".
We decide to go to a different place because Wayne wants pizza. So we have been all together about an hour and a half now just talking when Wayne says he has to go to the bathroom. He doesnt know where it is so Peepee girl says she will show him. While they are in there, he is peeing and she is doing her make-up, he gets done and washes his hands but turns around to see her facing him squating in the urinal.......WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! Now I know some people are comfortable peeing in front of other people, but a girl peeing spead legged in front of a guy she has known an hour? whoa.
After he comes back he decides its a bad idea for me to hook it up("told you so" i said). Wayne gets a call from a chick he knows and in no time we are joined by 2 other girls.....girs OUR age.
I guess I should explain now that this girl wasnt OLD, but she was old enough that i could guess she had a couple kids at home(she said she thought I was AT LEAST 30.....thanks). and she was actually pretty good looking, why was she after me?
So Peepee girl starts getting jealous that we are paying more attention to the new girls and takes me by the hand into the other room of the resteraunt and just hugs me.......then she is swaying so I figure she is really drunk, till i realize she is trying to get me to dance.
I dont dance.
It takes this girl like 5 songs to realize it is pointless for her to try this. She runs out the door and leaves, and is now just a story me any wayne tell to laugh a little.
Untill today when him and his now girlfriend were out eating and Peepee girl is managing the place. They are still eating and I havnt got any updates as to wether or not she recognizes him.
I know girls that would loooooove yoooou because you are that rare breed of shy goofy boy that is almost extinct now.
I bet that old woman had fleas.
I will be the queen of zombiemonkeys, just yoooou wait!
And yeah, you should marry my friend she isexactly like you. she whines about how she can never talk to boys because she doesnt know what to say therefore all of them in the entire world hate her and blah blah blah girly sad stuff.
I stayed up too late I must go to bed but I had to reply to you my friend!