outrightmd

boy am i feeling restless. i really, really need to find a job, my backup funds are running low. i've been looking for about two weeks now, but i haven't been looking as hard as i should. i know what kind of work i don't want to do: food service. i hate it. i've done a lot of it and i really don't want to do anymore. i'm tired of smelling like food when i come home. i want to work for barnes and noble again. i had a lot of fun when i worked there.

the other source of my restlessness would have to be girls. i don't know why i feel the need to be in a relationship right now; there is no real reason to be in one at the moment. i was thinking back to my last five years of relationships and realized that over that time period i've not just dated. i've gotten involved way too fast with whoever i've been talking too. coincidentally the past five years is also when my addiction got real bad. therapists call this behavior "hostage taking" and i would agree with that totally. although, i would have to say that those relationships were mutual hostage taking situations. i need to be working on myself right now, not worrying myself with external problems.

nothing too exciting happened this weekend, but i still had a pretty good time. i'm about to go hit the gym and then watch a movie.

omd.