Chocolate, chocolate chip and macadamia nut cookies are the devil! But, oh so delicious. 
The mechanics said that they need more time with the car to figure out all that is wrong. Bad sign. So far, the ignition is locked, the electricity is messed up, and something is wrong with the engine. $$$...none of it. So since we only have a few more months here if the car will be too expensive to fix we're just going to dump it. Oh well.
So I'm trying to transfer to UNC-FSU and I hope they will take most of my credits since I'll be coming from UNC. They don't have a Women's Studies major, only minor, no Japanese, and no Library Science major or minor. So, I'll probably transfer my Wmn Studies major into a Sociology major with a Wmn Studies minor. I have a friend whos currently doing the accelerated MSW there and I'll probably consider doing the same after getting my degree.
All these issues with my sexuality and my marriage. I suppose it comes down to how much I will be willing to give up in order to gain a clear conscience. Guilt pretty much stops me from doing anything right now because he leaves so soon and we both continue to ignore/avoid discussing it.
Sometimes I feel that I'd be capable of doing anything and everything all by myself then other times I'm so grateful that he's there to support me and I'm not alone.
What should I feel for my husband? I mean, how are you supposed to feel when you know its right?
I also freakin hate the thought of going back home and seeing some people from my congregation. I don't want to deal with the condescending/pitying looks and personal questions. I still worry about getting my parents in trouble since they'll have me under their roof so my appearance/behavior will reflect on them.
I feel like I have so many things I thought I dealt with and turns out, I just ran away and they waited for me to come back. Heh.
The mechanics said that they need more time with the car to figure out all that is wrong. Bad sign. So far, the ignition is locked, the electricity is messed up, and something is wrong with the engine. $$$...none of it. So since we only have a few more months here if the car will be too expensive to fix we're just going to dump it. Oh well.
So I'm trying to transfer to UNC-FSU and I hope they will take most of my credits since I'll be coming from UNC. They don't have a Women's Studies major, only minor, no Japanese, and no Library Science major or minor. So, I'll probably transfer my Wmn Studies major into a Sociology major with a Wmn Studies minor. I have a friend whos currently doing the accelerated MSW there and I'll probably consider doing the same after getting my degree.
All these issues with my sexuality and my marriage. I suppose it comes down to how much I will be willing to give up in order to gain a clear conscience. Guilt pretty much stops me from doing anything right now because he leaves so soon and we both continue to ignore/avoid discussing it.
Sometimes I feel that I'd be capable of doing anything and everything all by myself then other times I'm so grateful that he's there to support me and I'm not alone.
What should I feel for my husband? I mean, how are you supposed to feel when you know its right?
I also freakin hate the thought of going back home and seeing some people from my congregation. I don't want to deal with the condescending/pitying looks and personal questions. I still worry about getting my parents in trouble since they'll have me under their roof so my appearance/behavior will reflect on them.
I feel like I have so many things I thought I dealt with and turns out, I just ran away and they waited for me to come back. Heh.
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Anyhoo, I hope all your tribulations wind up good for you as for me mine are just starting.
An old friend of mine confessed having strong feelings for me and when her relationship is over wants to be with me. I really like her..I always have we have had this chemstry ever since we met. I kneww she might be mine ine day but neither of us were honest about it then
I guess I do regret it because.....I might love her to. And she came along WAY before Crystal and I did. But I love Crystal to.....I guess only time will be able to work this mess out..
I don't mind being loved in fact that is all I am asking for out of this life. But I won't betray anyone either
thus I am stuck between the rock and the hard place.
Btw- I'm still thinking about applying for SG- Still not too sure yet- but meanwhile I enjoy posting my very amateur pics.