I'm tired of writing about my marriage for right now. I don't want to dwell on the confusion, guilt, and indecision I still find myself in although I have a square answer that doesn't fit the circle-shaped hole even with force.
I have a best friend in the States I haven't talked to or personally emailed for months (she's done the same). Yet, my feelings for her never decrease. I love that girl as a best friend and everytime I go back to the States and call her up, she drives an hour up from SC to see me just a couple of hours if that's all she can manage. Its like we can put months, states, and countries between us and pick right up again. It's not confusing with her, never was and no matter who has come in our lives romantically she has always been my J. I can't wait to pick up where we left off when I go back to the States. She never gives me fake hugs, always those I'm-holding-you-close-because-its-real hugs, she always calls me her pooh (from the pooh bear tank top I wore all the time back in the day), and she never ends a phone conversation or leaves from a visit without saying she loves me. And the only reason I have a hard time saying that back to her is because its true and its not enough to describe our friendship.
I've had a Sex and the City marathon that has ended in a headache from leaving my glasses on too long. So I grab a chocolate muffin and green tea in hopes of smothering it with antioxidants and chocogoodness and I remember that I haven't opened the song 9ine sent me (Another Night in by Tindersticks). As soon as it starts I know I love it...the rest of the song just confirms it.
He made me think of J. 9ine and I haven't talked in a bit but that doesn't have any correlation to how much I've been thinking about him.
My headache has faded.
I have a best friend in the States I haven't talked to or personally emailed for months (she's done the same). Yet, my feelings for her never decrease. I love that girl as a best friend and everytime I go back to the States and call her up, she drives an hour up from SC to see me just a couple of hours if that's all she can manage. Its like we can put months, states, and countries between us and pick right up again. It's not confusing with her, never was and no matter who has come in our lives romantically she has always been my J. I can't wait to pick up where we left off when I go back to the States. She never gives me fake hugs, always those I'm-holding-you-close-because-its-real hugs, she always calls me her pooh (from the pooh bear tank top I wore all the time back in the day), and she never ends a phone conversation or leaves from a visit without saying she loves me. And the only reason I have a hard time saying that back to her is because its true and its not enough to describe our friendship.
I've had a Sex and the City marathon that has ended in a headache from leaving my glasses on too long. So I grab a chocolate muffin and green tea in hopes of smothering it with antioxidants and chocogoodness and I remember that I haven't opened the song 9ine sent me (Another Night in by Tindersticks). As soon as it starts I know I love it...the rest of the song just confirms it.
He made me think of J. 9ine and I haven't talked in a bit but that doesn't have any correlation to how much I've been thinking about him.
My headache has faded.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
thedarkness:
My wife and her friend are like that, it is endearing to hear that. Looks like you did not combust, I am happy.
krass_of_nod:
Yer welcome, i wish I could help more....as far as school, yep one more final on thursday and I am done....I did a bad thing though...I compromised my summer...I took one class for the summer *dives under the computer desk for cover*.... it shouldbe okay though it is a web graphic and design class.