I feel normal. I don't like it. I feel like I blend in again.
I smile about nothing.
I laugh and dance around at work.
I think everyone can tell.
I saw a photo of me and didn't realize it was me. I was cute.
I want to go to a dance party and drink and dance and let go.
I want to care about... Read More
I'm moving this week! My work commute will be cut in half. I happened to hang out with two of the new housemates at a show last night. All of these are good signs. I need to pack.
Ichi might build a swingset in our backyard. Once I tell him which house is mine.
Phil needs to find a job so we can cuddle again.... Read More
Dear Oriole,
Welcome back. You've been missing for months.
I think I might be past the cloud that has been post-Ichi. Because I've been thinking of it as post-Ichi. Me is me is not me without him. It's finally over. I slept at his old house after a party and wasn't upset in the morning.
I think I may have discovered a group of friends... Read More
Last night we were hanging out at The Know talking. He was being as honest as possible telling me that it might not work out romantically but that he's loves me and I'm one ofthe best people he's ever met. Way to tell me every fucking thing I ever hoped and have been needing someone would tell me. And he... Read More
Not that I have any real clue as to how your wheels are turning inside that lovely noggin' of yours, I'd like to think that I understand, from recent and personal experience. And please, keep existing. It can't rain all the time, ya' know? Not that my pearls of wisdom really mean anything to you, but all I really can offer are my thoughts, and positive emotions, however little they improve your situation.
I am still very in love with Ichi. We spent this morning cuddling in bed. But we aren't together and it shouldn't have happened. And I can see and feel that he feels the same. When he left, my eyes were full of tears and he was looking at me sniffling.
I swear to god that he is who I'm meant for and anything else... Read More
There, I did it. I deleted the photos of me and Ichi kissing and otherwise being super cute on facebook from back in January. I'm holding back tears just from looking at those stupid things. It's good that I finally did it. It only took 3 months post-breakup to be able to. I should've at least changed the cover before now.
Phil is busyful and said he'd get in touch. I need to stop taking it personally, I guess. I don't know. Now I feel boring or like I fucked it up. I want to complain on tumblr, but he follows me.
Yeah, don't let him know how you feel. Not on tumblr at least
He shouldn't make a big deal out of it but it's not the forum for it plus don't want to risk him taking it the wrong way.
Thank god you have SG right? Unless hes' on it
I'm feeling you on the lonely feeling. I have friend but none have time for me
Phil met me for tea on Sunday afternoon. We ended up spending the day together and watched cartoons for hours. He walked me to the bus stop and put his arm around my waist and held onto me. I didn't know what to do with my hands.
I hadn't expected to like him this much. I had, yet again, been oblivious to the fact it... Read More
Yeah. I've already managed to convince myself that I've messed it up and he's not into me anymore. Wether or not this is true is yet to be seen of course.
Pittsburgh guy is fucking awkward. I'm not into it.
I hung out with Ichi for a bit on Saturday; a terrible idea. I ended up getting really uncomfortable and then upset after we left. I'm at the point of mourning even our friendship. It's really shitty, I really like him as a... Read More
Everytime I have a breakup I am devastated that I'll never be with a person who's exactly like that again. But I'll probably be kissing another pretty girl before too long, which is comforting.
I should've at least changed the cover before now.
