i appologize to all my journal readers in advacne, well, not really, sort of in the middle of it.
but my journal entries will be shitty and pissy and whiney untill the holidays are over. and by that i mean, more so than usual.
i hate holiays. mainly thanksgiving (we raped indians! lets celebrate!), chanukah/xmas, valentines day, and my birthday.
h a t e t h e m.
so right now i am completely and utterly depressed. i wanted my roomate nick (who's basement i used to rent) to bring me the xmas tree i left there (a bunch of my stuff is still there being held untill i have my own place) but yeah, its like this lik three foot tall xmas tree i wanted to put up so i'd feel a little more cheerful. i knew i was going to end up here alone and i wanted something to make it a bit more bearable. of course, he kept forgetting, all three times i asked him to get it. which makes me mad. i was hoping the check shauna was supposed to be sending would get here sooner than xmas so not only could i be eating and own a coat now, but i could get me a little box of cookies, some non alcoholic egg nog, some xmas movie rentals, and had my own lil, not as lonley xmas by myself. but no. he didn't get the fucking tree, and shauna sat on that check for a little while, so my xmas cheer is at ZERO. having sesonal depression is bad enough. add in the fact that my holidays always end up alone and cold and unwanted and ....ugh. i'm suprised i get thru it every fucking year. all i want right now is to curl up in a ball and get trashed for teh next few days and not remember a damn fucking thing.
my only saving grace is knowing that williamj has sent me a card with some photos and i can't wait to get it. he's my little (quite tall) xmas buddy.before last year (my first willy jay card) i hadn't gotten any holiday recognition that wasn't forced (my dads gf doing bc she had too or else my dad would have been mad...god forbid he did it himself) in.....four..five years? and also this year jasonxstar is sending me a card as well
i just want this shit to end already. fucking xmas
but my journal entries will be shitty and pissy and whiney untill the holidays are over. and by that i mean, more so than usual.
i hate holiays. mainly thanksgiving (we raped indians! lets celebrate!), chanukah/xmas, valentines day, and my birthday.
h a t e t h e m.
so right now i am completely and utterly depressed. i wanted my roomate nick (who's basement i used to rent) to bring me the xmas tree i left there (a bunch of my stuff is still there being held untill i have my own place) but yeah, its like this lik three foot tall xmas tree i wanted to put up so i'd feel a little more cheerful. i knew i was going to end up here alone and i wanted something to make it a bit more bearable. of course, he kept forgetting, all three times i asked him to get it. which makes me mad. i was hoping the check shauna was supposed to be sending would get here sooner than xmas so not only could i be eating and own a coat now, but i could get me a little box of cookies, some non alcoholic egg nog, some xmas movie rentals, and had my own lil, not as lonley xmas by myself. but no. he didn't get the fucking tree, and shauna sat on that check for a little while, so my xmas cheer is at ZERO. having sesonal depression is bad enough. add in the fact that my holidays always end up alone and cold and unwanted and ....ugh. i'm suprised i get thru it every fucking year. all i want right now is to curl up in a ball and get trashed for teh next few days and not remember a damn fucking thing.
my only saving grace is knowing that williamj has sent me a card with some photos and i can't wait to get it. he's my little (quite tall) xmas buddy.before last year (my first willy jay card) i hadn't gotten any holiday recognition that wasn't forced (my dads gf doing bc she had too or else my dad would have been mad...god forbid he did it himself) in.....four..five years? and also this year jasonxstar is sending me a card as well
i just want this shit to end already. fucking xmas
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
williamj:
hopefully that card will get there tommorow. i mailed it on tuesday and it was 2 day mail but i dont know about how fast the post office is this time of year.
koenigsegg:
aw. i wish you had posted this a week ago. if you'd have trusted a total e-stranger w/ your mailing addy, i would have put you on my christmas card list.