originalzombee

this weekend is my birthday

i'll be spending it alone seeing as someone who WAS going to pick me up and have fun with me hasn't called.

so if you have a car, feel free to call me and visit me. other wise, at least call and say happy fucking birthday.

i feel no shame giving out the number, its a payphone........

631 758 8563


i hate birthdays.

edited to add:
and i got a really upsetting thing from matt today. turns out he had legit feelings for me, and can't even handle beng my friend anymore because i'm "too confusing"

go me.

i've given up. i really think fate means for me to be sad, lonley, and for me to hate everyone.

because everything right now is really adding up to that. people keep promising one thing, and i end up with another. no one seems to be honest. i feel like i don't really know the REAL anyone. i just know the masks they wear. i'm alone, and depressed, and terrified of the town i'm in (shitty neighborhood, the kind with a huge sex offender rate in it) i have no friends. no one calls me. i've lost my appitite, (i've also lost 8 pounds in a week) and i can't stop crying. i've also started cutting again a wee bit. this sucks. i'm hitting a low again. i just want a fucking job (which i finally got) and an appartment. i can't do this shelter shit too much longer.