Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

onetruesephiroth

Carlsbad, CA

Member Since 2003

Followers 2 Following 0

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Friday Dec 12, 2003

Dec 11, 2003
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
I'm gonna lay down the funny for you all (only it ain't funny)...

"The Continuing Adventures of Two Dudes!"

Dude #1: "So I says to her, I says 'You dumb fucking cunt, I'm going to kick you right in the balls."

#1: "Then she looks me right in the eye and says. 'You stupid slobbering retard, I don't have any balls."

Dude #2: "And?"

#1: "So she pulls down her pants and I can clearly see she has no balls, then she points and says 'See no nuts."

#1: "She begins to pull up her pants, so I say 'Are you sure? Let me see again, just to make certian."

#2: "What happend?"

#1: "Well, she pulled some pepper spray out of her pocket, and blasted me in the face with it, and then kicked me in the nuts.

#2: "Ouch!"

#1: "You're Goddamn right ouch, that shit burns like a motherfucker, plus my balls are still swollen up like...ummm..."

#2: "Bowling balls?"

#1: "No, like uhhh...."

#2: "Softballs?'

#1: "No! More like...

#2: "Tennis Balls, no wait! Bread... No, apples... gravy... very small rocks... I know... A duck!"

#1: "Nuts don't swell up like a duck you moron. Now why'd you say something so stupid?"

#2: "Well, he had to put something funny in this bit... So why not rip off Monty Python?"

#1: "Good point..."

#2: "Where were we?"

#1: "She kicked my nuts..."

#2: "Oh yeah, that sucks"

#1: "Yeah, but I still saw her naked."

#2: "Dude, sweet, you so scored."

the end?

(crickets............................)
rickroyal:
Almost a modern day Waiting for Godot. Kinda cool, actually. Reminds me of a series of short plays a friend was writing. I don't think he ever got around to finishing them, though.

One wonders, though, if the newfound gems would be world siftly through the tidal wave of crap to find. We'd have to come up with some kind of filtering system; reviewers would have to be paid more, or something.
Dec 11, 2003
debrajean:
^hahahah, waiting for godot?!?!
Dec 18, 2003

More Blogs

  • 08.25.03
    3

    Monday Aug 25, 2003

    friends, come along with me on a journey... i know where it starts, a…
  • 08.23.03
    0

    Saturday Aug 23, 2003

    sweet, sweet depression, finally you have returned. a swing back arou…
  • 08.22.03
    2

    Friday Aug 22, 2003

    children, i love them, and look forward to having one of my own some …
  • 08.21.03
    0

    Thursday Aug 21, 2003

    actually i changed my mind, i just want to talk about "The Empire Str…
  • 08.19.03
    1

    Tuesday Aug 19, 2003

    i want to talk about one of my heros... and it's not bill hicks, it's…
  • 08.18.03
    0

    Monday Aug 18, 2003

    i had a dream last night about a female friend of mine that i haven't…
  • 08.17.03
    1

    Sunday Aug 17, 2003

    i would love to put somthing witty, and sarcastic here as a follow up…
  • 08.15.03
    2

    Friday Aug 15, 2003

    A little quote from my hero Bill Hicks (since I've put up no unfunny …
  • 08.13.03
    1

    Wednesday Aug 13, 2003

    Ok, this is a little piece of shit that i wrote about a year or two a…
  • 08.11.03
    1

    Monday Aug 11, 2003

    I had this dream the other night, more like a vision actually (brough…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
10
months
27
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,600 SuicideGirls
  • 1,115,138 followers
  • 14,950,629 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,468,875 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo