Alright y'all, here's a bit more twisted shit
THE REAL STORY BEHIND SANTA CLAUS:
Daddy: "Good night sweetheart."
Little Girl: "Good night Daddy..."
D: "Whats wrong honey?"
LG: "Tommy's big brother says Santa isn't real."
D: "Well don't you believe a word Tommy's brother says, because he's a bastard, and you know what a bastard is?"
LG: "No."
D: "It means that no one knows who Tommy's brother's daddy is, because his mother is a whore."
LG: "Oh, ok, but what about the cookies?"
D: "What about them?"
LG: "Well we always make cookies for Santa every year and he never eats them, why not?"
D: "Umm, well you see... the truth is... that Santa is a demon, do you know what a demon is?"
LG: "No, I don't, I thought he was an Elf?"
D: "No, that's a lie, you see sweetie, a demon is a spawn of hell, a minion of Satan, and that's how Santa got his powers; the never ending bag of presents, the flying reindeer, and the ability to visit all the children in the world in one night. Do you understand so far?"
LG: "Yes..."
D: "Good, but using his powers so much, makes Santa very hungry. Well, once, along time ago, one whole village forgot to leave stuff out for Santa to eat, and he ate all the kids in the village, so now, people always leave somthing out for Santa to eat, so he won't eat their children. And the reason that he never eats our cookies is because, he's too full by the time he gets here. Does that answer your question?"
LG: "Umm... yeah."
D: "Well then good night princess."
LG: "Umm, daddy?"
D: "Yes?"
LG: "I'm scared, can you sing me a lullaby."
D: "I don't really know any good ones honey, except maybe... how's this one. You better not shout, You better not cry..."
End
Well everyone fuck you till tomorrow, and good night out there in SuicideLand.
THE REAL STORY BEHIND SANTA CLAUS:
Daddy: "Good night sweetheart."
Little Girl: "Good night Daddy..."
D: "Whats wrong honey?"
LG: "Tommy's big brother says Santa isn't real."
D: "Well don't you believe a word Tommy's brother says, because he's a bastard, and you know what a bastard is?"
LG: "No."
D: "It means that no one knows who Tommy's brother's daddy is, because his mother is a whore."
LG: "Oh, ok, but what about the cookies?"
D: "What about them?"
LG: "Well we always make cookies for Santa every year and he never eats them, why not?"
D: "Umm, well you see... the truth is... that Santa is a demon, do you know what a demon is?"
LG: "No, I don't, I thought he was an Elf?"
D: "No, that's a lie, you see sweetie, a demon is a spawn of hell, a minion of Satan, and that's how Santa got his powers; the never ending bag of presents, the flying reindeer, and the ability to visit all the children in the world in one night. Do you understand so far?"
LG: "Yes..."
D: "Good, but using his powers so much, makes Santa very hungry. Well, once, along time ago, one whole village forgot to leave stuff out for Santa to eat, and he ate all the kids in the village, so now, people always leave somthing out for Santa to eat, so he won't eat their children. And the reason that he never eats our cookies is because, he's too full by the time he gets here. Does that answer your question?"
LG: "Umm... yeah."
D: "Well then good night princess."
LG: "Umm, daddy?"
D: "Yes?"
LG: "I'm scared, can you sing me a lullaby."
D: "I don't really know any good ones honey, except maybe... how's this one. You better not shout, You better not cry..."
End
Well everyone fuck you till tomorrow, and good night out there in SuicideLand.