I just read that a pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. I don't know if that's true or not, because the interweb has told me so many things that aren't actually true (do you know that girls don't actually strip down to their lingerie and have pillow fights every time they get together!?!?! This only happens roughly 4 out of 10 times, if you can believe the latest scientific research), but still, it's nice to think that pigs can actually be as happy as, well, pigs in shit. Also, I'm a little bit jealous. Their orgasm is longer than my pick up line, trip back to my place, foreplay, the deed itself, and the shower afterward. Maybe I should work on that.
So, because I really do have a truly uninspiring life, yet I really do want to blog every day, or close to it, I'm just going to take suggestions. Yep, you give me a topic, I'll blog about it. I realise that this is going to be humiliating to start, because I have only 6 friends so far, and as far as I know, Rydell and Natassja are the only ones who read my blogs (all one of them, so far), so you two have a lot of pressure on you right now. Hopefully, more people will eventually check in and give me ideas.
Fucking pigs. I actually resent them a little bit right now.
Anyway, Rydell suggested that I blog about the Vancouver music scene. To be dreadfully honest, there isn't much to blog about there. I have absolutely nothing against Nickleback. In fact, I have the utmost respect for them. They created a sound that has sparked billions upon billions of knock-off bands, and have been wildly successful. However, I really don't enjoy their music. The rest of Vancouver, though, does, and to be successful in Vancouver, a band has to sound like Nickleback, with very few exceptions. I used to play in a gutter punk band, and we actually had success, but not in Vancouver. Not even in Canada, for that matter. We ended up just not playing shows here, and we'd go across the border to wicked shows just down in Bellingham, and then across the states. It was pathetic that we could play shows in Kansas, of all places, and have rabid crowds, and get less than 50 scenesters coming out to a show in Vancouver who would MAYBE tap one foot if they got really into it. Tons of cool venues have shut down in Vancouver because people just want dance clubs, and other cool places to play have early rock shows so they can kick everybody out and then get the dance crowd in by 11. I don't know why Vancouver is like this, and obviously people like doing what they do, so I'm a minority. Who am I to judge?
I do know that the band I'm in now, OneStarCity , , just played a couple of shows in Calgary and Edmonton, and we can't wait to go back! The cats there know what a rock show is...
Anyway, I don't want to seem like a bitter bear, cause I'm really not one. There, that's my blog about the Vancouver music scene.
Damn, really? A 30 minute orgasm?
We'll be shooting a video soon (with any luck) for our song "Panther Vs Your Face." I'll keep you posted about that. For now, you can check out a video my old band did. It made it onto MuchMusic, and then the band promptly imploded.
If I liked pork more, I'd go eat a bacon sandwich. Little fuckers.
I have one more rant today, then I'll stop, I promise. I have no problem with old ladies. It happens to all of us (the old part, not the lady part. The lady part happens mostly in Thailand). However, I DO have a problem with old lady smell. I smelled an old lady today, and I got very irate. I mean, really, you can't cover up the smell of rotting flesh by dousing yourself in stinkass perfume that you bought in a 5 gallon bucket at a garage sale for two dollars. Stop being so lazy....pick up your skin folds, scrub, do something. Cause now you just smell like old AND crappy perfume.
I think I hate pigs.
So, because I really do have a truly uninspiring life, yet I really do want to blog every day, or close to it, I'm just going to take suggestions. Yep, you give me a topic, I'll blog about it. I realise that this is going to be humiliating to start, because I have only 6 friends so far, and as far as I know, Rydell and Natassja are the only ones who read my blogs (all one of them, so far), so you two have a lot of pressure on you right now. Hopefully, more people will eventually check in and give me ideas.
Fucking pigs. I actually resent them a little bit right now.
Anyway, Rydell suggested that I blog about the Vancouver music scene. To be dreadfully honest, there isn't much to blog about there. I have absolutely nothing against Nickleback. In fact, I have the utmost respect for them. They created a sound that has sparked billions upon billions of knock-off bands, and have been wildly successful. However, I really don't enjoy their music. The rest of Vancouver, though, does, and to be successful in Vancouver, a band has to sound like Nickleback, with very few exceptions. I used to play in a gutter punk band, and we actually had success, but not in Vancouver. Not even in Canada, for that matter. We ended up just not playing shows here, and we'd go across the border to wicked shows just down in Bellingham, and then across the states. It was pathetic that we could play shows in Kansas, of all places, and have rabid crowds, and get less than 50 scenesters coming out to a show in Vancouver who would MAYBE tap one foot if they got really into it. Tons of cool venues have shut down in Vancouver because people just want dance clubs, and other cool places to play have early rock shows so they can kick everybody out and then get the dance crowd in by 11. I don't know why Vancouver is like this, and obviously people like doing what they do, so I'm a minority. Who am I to judge?
I do know that the band I'm in now, OneStarCity , , just played a couple of shows in Calgary and Edmonton, and we can't wait to go back! The cats there know what a rock show is...
Anyway, I don't want to seem like a bitter bear, cause I'm really not one. There, that's my blog about the Vancouver music scene.
Damn, really? A 30 minute orgasm?
We'll be shooting a video soon (with any luck) for our song "Panther Vs Your Face." I'll keep you posted about that. For now, you can check out a video my old band did. It made it onto MuchMusic, and then the band promptly imploded.
If I liked pork more, I'd go eat a bacon sandwich. Little fuckers.
I have one more rant today, then I'll stop, I promise. I have no problem with old ladies. It happens to all of us (the old part, not the lady part. The lady part happens mostly in Thailand). However, I DO have a problem with old lady smell. I smelled an old lady today, and I got very irate. I mean, really, you can't cover up the smell of rotting flesh by dousing yourself in stinkass perfume that you bought in a 5 gallon bucket at a garage sale for two dollars. Stop being so lazy....pick up your skin folds, scrub, do something. Cause now you just smell like old AND crappy perfume.
I think I hate pigs.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
I think you should blog about your Dreams. Do you remember them? Because if so then I bet they are awesome.
As far as old lady smell, ew. I must say that I do wear perfume, but I smell like heaven. Not poop.