There are few things good about being stuck in the middle of nowhere.
And one of them are the storms. I'm not speakin' tornados and hurricanes..
I'm talkin' run of the mill thunder storms. But fucking hell do they speak loud.
Right ear hears strange shaking.. step outside every dog in a 10 mile radius is going ape shit.
The sky ignites in shattershot spurts, brief descriptions of the sky above.
The ground rumbles and then it pours. And oh does it pour.
So what does a brain damaged boy with a festive case of alcohol slip between the scars?
Well bad movies of course fucktard, what the hell else?
Representing on the annual crackpot adventures into posthumous movie reviews is me.
Providing what no one asked for from the boy who couldn't care less.
But it's raining out! So no redneck vodka worm stories this eve...
So in quick and beautiful sentences i'll break it down..
X-MEN THE LAST STAND: Jean Grey is Phoenix: Who is my favorite superhero EVAR. And well she fucks shit up. Hard. The characters from their previous roles, as X-MEN rawk it up. Rest of the film: punches kids in the face and calls them faggots.
DOOM: The best actor in this movie is "The Rock". The part where it attempts to simulate the real the game is up there on one of those BEST/WORST movie moments ever for me. It insults me and finds my adoration at the same exact time. Also they have no bras on Mars.
DOMINO: Keira Knightley, Mickey Rourke, Christopher Walken, Mena Suvari, Tom Waits and the two douche bags from 90210 no one can remember to name star in a music video about a director who thought he could plot twist out a hyper stylized Tarantino film. Rent if you want to slap Kiera in the face with a handful of semen and tell how fake her name sounds. Girls you can do the same, i'll provide examples of substances you can use as fake cum (on request) so you can play at home.
So good night. And poop.
(and no i meant i will suggest cum look alikes, not my own).
And one of them are the storms. I'm not speakin' tornados and hurricanes..
I'm talkin' run of the mill thunder storms. But fucking hell do they speak loud.
Right ear hears strange shaking.. step outside every dog in a 10 mile radius is going ape shit.
The sky ignites in shattershot spurts, brief descriptions of the sky above.
The ground rumbles and then it pours. And oh does it pour.
So what does a brain damaged boy with a festive case of alcohol slip between the scars?
Well bad movies of course fucktard, what the hell else?
Representing on the annual crackpot adventures into posthumous movie reviews is me.
Providing what no one asked for from the boy who couldn't care less.
But it's raining out! So no redneck vodka worm stories this eve...
So in quick and beautiful sentences i'll break it down..
X-MEN THE LAST STAND: Jean Grey is Phoenix: Who is my favorite superhero EVAR. And well she fucks shit up. Hard. The characters from their previous roles, as X-MEN rawk it up. Rest of the film: punches kids in the face and calls them faggots.
DOOM: The best actor in this movie is "The Rock". The part where it attempts to simulate the real the game is up there on one of those BEST/WORST movie moments ever for me. It insults me and finds my adoration at the same exact time. Also they have no bras on Mars.
DOMINO: Keira Knightley, Mickey Rourke, Christopher Walken, Mena Suvari, Tom Waits and the two douche bags from 90210 no one can remember to name star in a music video about a director who thought he could plot twist out a hyper stylized Tarantino film. Rent if you want to slap Kiera in the face with a handful of semen and tell how fake her name sounds. Girls you can do the same, i'll provide examples of substances you can use as fake cum (on request) so you can play at home.
So good night. And poop.
(and no i meant i will suggest cum look alikes, not my own).
liv:
hey lost you....