Saturday Mar 24, 2007

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aaronsrod:
yes it is cute glad to see you still exist biggrin
infinity:
i didnt doubt your existence. but having a headache and being grumpy...well that sucks.

Thursday Mar 22, 2007

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Getting back in touch with myself, my interests, my friends.

Letting stress rise off of my skin like steam, to leave me calmer and happier underneath.

I'm feeling a bit like the ache and drama of my discarded life are still following in my shadow, sneaking up on me, even as I learn to relax. Privacy does not exist. Nor does letting go.




Keep on...
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pandoradawn:
good advice smile
infinity:
getting back in touch with life and letting the bad go, that's really good for yourself. both emotionally and for your health.

Tuesday Mar 13, 2007

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I have an unhealthy preoccupation with violins.

Seriously. I have a crush on my violin. Literal, butterflies in the stomach, halfway to love, schoolgirl crush.

When the violin catalog comes to my home it's like the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, only better, because if I really want to, I can buy any model I want.

Speaking of swimsuits, do you think it's possible to get...
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theraccoon:
Hey speaking of violins, I got internet again. how are you?
salome:
I would love to hear you play sometime!

Sunday Mar 11, 2007

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The last two months of my life have been filled with enough drama and angst to last a lifetime. Here's hoping for an end to troubles and a beginning to insight and understanding.
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infinity:
hope that things get less drama filled and as a result, less stressful soon.
ninjaprodigy:
Hoping right there with you, for you

Sunday Mar 04, 2007

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pandoradawn:
Lovely pic of both of you, kitties are awesome smile

Hope your recital went well, how long have you been playing? Music is such a beautiful art form.

Just read your last post.....sorry to hear about your dad and his health. I know my mom has had health problems for the last 10 years and she just seems to be getting weaker and weaker. In fact, my whole family has had to pitch in to take turns helping take care of her. I can be very stressful. Also sorry to hear about the job woes, I'm sure that doesn't help with the stress level. Sounds like that IT guy is a genuine assbag....sex with sheep.....nice.
hysanadu:
Cats always seem just as curious about humans as we are about them.

Friday Mar 02, 2007

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Random tidbits:

I've been considering quitting my job. It's a great company, in my narrow field, but I am overstressed and understimulated.

It is just me and my boss, and no other employees. My boss is away often. When he is gone, I feel lonely, when he is around, I feel crowded and stifled. To make matters worse, during a recent computer crisis that rendered...
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aaronsrod:
Um yeah, what thedvsmonkey said

oh and if your boss calls you a liar again tell him I would like a word with him in my office!


salome:
Oh fuck that shit. Quit. That's not a good environment to be working in.

Monday Feb 19, 2007

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Britney Spears shaved her head and got tattooed.

I'm excited. I've thought she was hott since her schoolgirl days, I think she has a pretty vagina, and girls with tattoos and a shaved head are statistically more likely to bone me.

I think I have a real chance with her.
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aaronsrod:


http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=Retaw

he is an Aussie guy from Sydney.
aaronsrod:
yeah he does hold it short and I have seen fiddlers bow that way, love his work tho. It looks funny him playing left handed even if it is just the video reversed

Monday Feb 12, 2007

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I chase my demons on a seven-year string.

There have truths I have tried to tell - to confess - over and again, to those who would hear me. But each time, I was interrupted and told how my thoughts end.

The air churned and changed as I relaxed the breaths of unmuttered confessions.
Terrifying truths I was dying to tell went too long unspoken....
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infinity:
i sometimes wonder about life, from those random moments when i think that i'm in the matrix to other times where i question how much i have changed, if i have changed really at all. my not so good memory does not help though, since it's hard for me to remember much of anything that has happened to me, even from stuff a few months ago.
salome:
At least you have only two selves -- the ghosts of my former selves occasionally possess my body, the skins I have shed still lie hidden under the bed.

Tuesday Feb 06, 2007

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It is 5:30 in the morning.

I went to bed 6 hours ago, needing a good night's sleep because I'm sick.

I have tossed and turned and sniffled all night long, passing the time with frequent trips to the bathroom and wandering thoughts of nothing.

But sleep? Not bloody happening. This sucks.
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pandoradawn:
That sounds fun. Are you going to school here, or have you always lived here?
I just moved here a few years ago, from Indiana.
ricoxx:
Insomnia is a curse! I feel for you.

Sunday Jan 28, 2007

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I am sitting in my lovers' house, lonely as they sleep, wanting nothing more than to be in the arms of the boy who hurt me until I broke.

I have cried the morning away.

It feels like someone has slipped poison into my veins.

I want to walk out the door, close it gently behind me, and run. Run from everything.
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infinity:
hope you feel better, not fun feeling this way, but perhaps it is time to leave the house...
acidevangelist:
If he hurt you, how is trust an issue? Sounds to me that he is been disloyal to you. Be strong, and do the right thing for you.
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