Self realization has stricken me like a thunderbolt from the heavens. No more complaining about how people treat me shitty, or how I have failed at another relationship with a woman. Things that seemed to work in high school in terms of romancing and such do not work these days anymore of course and I sometimes fail to realize that, because of my ever so present BIG EGO. Maybe some day I can let go of this weapon of mass destruction that desensetizes all the possible relationships I could possibly have. What in the world is this pretty little Croatian boy talking about you may ask yourself ladies and gentlemen? Well I am talking about being an asshole to people in order to make myself seem cocky attractive or arrogant, which I thought most women seem to find attractive in a guy, as opposed to just being a nice guy, blending in and being "cookie" cutter per se. I realize that I can never be either one of those because I despise assholes and I despise the NORM, the cookie cutter mentality guy, driving a nice fucking car, benchpressing three times my body mass or having a cool ass hair cut and piercings. No, I am not an emo kid and I most certainly am not a preppie, and in fact, this day and age, I am sad to say that I don't even know what I am classified as. Classification as an entity by itself sucks ass, so I am glad that no one can exactly say, "Vedran is this way". The bottomline of the entire discussion here is the fact that I need to by less my asshole self and more friendly and upbeat to people, because that is what seems to be selling itself to them, an endearing personality, afraid to step outside the box. I am a very sarcastic, cynnical and arrogant person at times, however, those who know me also know that I genuinely give two shits about them. The problem is, most people get this rough exterior, asshole side of me that isn't so popular. I will try work on being less an asshole, and more of a nice guy. Despite all the shortcomings in my life, the deaths that I have had to endure, my father's sickness, my constant want to be with someone, I am a happy motherfucker. It's time for this happy motherfucker to be nicer to people.
nanci:
hey, how you doing? thought id stop by say hi
(beingall friendly like that today hehe)

carina:
If I can do it you can. I've toned down my assholeness so much over the past couple months and it definitely improved my quality of living and helped me meet a lot of great people. There can be a good middle ground of those things.