ohdang

Good God

Since living in this house everyday day has been living in a sitcom
I love my family but I cannot wait to get the fuck out of here
I feel like I'm on the set of Arrested Development everyday

If I didn't need to save money to live in a real city
I'd so be outta this place

Right now shes in front of the tv jumping around the living room to a workout video called 'Sweating to the Oldies' by Richard Simmons.
Yes its a VHS, and yes it must be 20 years old at this point.
She also just said: "Man this would be a whole lot easier if I had another boob"

Love 'em, but I gotta leave 'em

I worked with a sweet girl who used to be a stripper and decided she needed a change of career. I would have never guessed - She looks like shes twelve (shes 22), and shes already had enough botox shots to keep up the titanic afloat

I just lost my health care and I would love some right now. Next time I'm in Detroit I'm going to hop across the border to Canada and find someone to marry

[EDIT] Meow?