When people have an integrity breach, I am sensitive to that, and am thrown off balance. (Note, integrity breaches are for instance when they say theyll do something, but they dont follow up) But the smallest integrity breaches are worse. Like a bullet. A remark demonstrating mistrust can tear a hole in my stomach. I think its natural to be effected by people who have a lack of integrity. Such a thing will throw me into a state of chaos. And Ill get sad, almost passive-aggressive, but without the intentional sabotage of performance that passive aggressive behavior involves. Cause Im not actually feeling wronged, Im just in a state, like a fight-or-flight response or something. But theres no fighting allowed. And no flight allowed. So Im just vibrating. One of these days Im going to resonate like a tuning fork. And hordes of evil rabbits are going to arrive and they will have fangs and little collars with their names on. And one of them named Thor will speak Norwegian and will only eat onions. I dont know. There has to be something, some lesson or something that Im not getting. Why do people feel entitled to mistrust each other so much. Mistrust is death. A childish naivety kind of trust is life. Perhaps this is wrong. In conclusion, I dislike being a victim of other peoples integrity breaches.
I was having this idea today. Some people promote the idea that GOD wants people to behave a special way. And I think they are wrong. But I also think they may have a point. Cause there is probably a network of social mechanisms that combine to create a GOD effect within the world. There is all this stuff that is, that seems like laws its so powerful, and if you try to ignore it, it will hammer you down. So its like tendencies. Like probabilities. They are not invented by any single conscious mind, but they do come into being, and they do have complex interactions that no person could totally know. And if you align yourself with the network of social mechanisms, even in some tangential manner, like by being a christian, then you might on occasion receive a reward. And it is indeed because of your participation, your active belief, that some of those positive effects come into being. In this manner, belief is just a word for aligning yourself with some aspect of the way things are. Spouting off about the goodness of the lord and such is just egocentric behavior, a way of saying Im right. And being like me is the way to heaven. You dont appreciate what I prefer, so youre gonna suffer Bah. I dont even believe in suffering. Suffering is just signals from the body to the brain. Hooray for it. May it rage out of control like a god damned inferno. Hoo fucking ray. Whenever I take the time to properly acknowledge a pain, it fades. Soon, you will suffer!!! says the man with the ego the size of texas. The american political christians are totally into forcing others to conform to their received truths, as if they themselves were gods emissaries on earth. They totally understand what the lord wants a typical person to do in all these different situations. Anyway. I think they are wrong and that I am wrong as well. And that inflicting your will on other people is an evil thing to do. And that liberty is life itself. But the idea I was writing about . You could call the network of social mechanisms a living being, a lord, but I think thats wrong. I dont think it has thoughts, or desires, or any kind of consciousness. But nevertheless it has a substantial effect on life. It might behave like a body of water. It provides a framework in which certain types of life can come about. But its not something that creates life all by itself. But its something that participates in the creation of the world, and of the people. And, in turn, the people participate in the creation of it right back too. Just to be clear. I dont actually believe this is a fact. Its an idea I was thinking. Like here we go imagining. Like an exploration of a theory. Like a work of fiction dressed up in a faggoty kind of thoughtfulness that serves no purpose that Im aware of. I think if there was a god that was all powerful and all loveable, a description of him or her would be completely impossible.
I was having this idea today. Some people promote the idea that GOD wants people to behave a special way. And I think they are wrong. But I also think they may have a point. Cause there is probably a network of social mechanisms that combine to create a GOD effect within the world. There is all this stuff that is, that seems like laws its so powerful, and if you try to ignore it, it will hammer you down. So its like tendencies. Like probabilities. They are not invented by any single conscious mind, but they do come into being, and they do have complex interactions that no person could totally know. And if you align yourself with the network of social mechanisms, even in some tangential manner, like by being a christian, then you might on occasion receive a reward. And it is indeed because of your participation, your active belief, that some of those positive effects come into being. In this manner, belief is just a word for aligning yourself with some aspect of the way things are. Spouting off about the goodness of the lord and such is just egocentric behavior, a way of saying Im right. And being like me is the way to heaven. You dont appreciate what I prefer, so youre gonna suffer Bah. I dont even believe in suffering. Suffering is just signals from the body to the brain. Hooray for it. May it rage out of control like a god damned inferno. Hoo fucking ray. Whenever I take the time to properly acknowledge a pain, it fades. Soon, you will suffer!!! says the man with the ego the size of texas. The american political christians are totally into forcing others to conform to their received truths, as if they themselves were gods emissaries on earth. They totally understand what the lord wants a typical person to do in all these different situations. Anyway. I think they are wrong and that I am wrong as well. And that inflicting your will on other people is an evil thing to do. And that liberty is life itself. But the idea I was writing about . You could call the network of social mechanisms a living being, a lord, but I think thats wrong. I dont think it has thoughts, or desires, or any kind of consciousness. But nevertheless it has a substantial effect on life. It might behave like a body of water. It provides a framework in which certain types of life can come about. But its not something that creates life all by itself. But its something that participates in the creation of the world, and of the people. And, in turn, the people participate in the creation of it right back too. Just to be clear. I dont actually believe this is a fact. Its an idea I was thinking. Like here we go imagining. Like an exploration of a theory. Like a work of fiction dressed up in a faggoty kind of thoughtfulness that serves no purpose that Im aware of. I think if there was a god that was all powerful and all loveable, a description of him or her would be completely impossible.