The past two nights I've been having like mini panic attacks about all the change happening suddenly. It's all good things though so I don't really know why I'm feeling like this. I'm inclined to believe that my brain just doesn't know how to be happy on its own and so it's short wiring itself 😂
I've started seeing someone who is just the sweetest person and I've got pretty good feels about it, despite the distance.
I've got a new job, it's in care work which is new for me but the pay is really good and the hours are flexible so it can work around skyler and my possible working at the tattoo studio. I guess I'm nervous to start a job that's completely new to me, I'm used to working in admin or customer service based roles so it's a big change. I'm also nervous about the tattoo studio thing cocking up. The owner is away at the moment and I've not been hearing great things so I'm a bit worried that it's going to fall apart.
So potentially I could have a good relationship, a means to pay my rent and be able to buy myself things without regretting it, I could start saving up for my own car and other things.
Everything could be about to work out perfectly this year, just like I wanted it to.
So why am I so nervous?
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oddish:
That makes a lot of sense @_d4n_ perhaps it's that I'm worried that as has happened so often in the past when things go right they go wrong again :( it's tough. Stupid stupid brains.Â
_d4n_:
Yeah, it's like the sensible part of my brain is saying "it'll be fine, you'll be able to charm the whatnots off her" but there's a voice in there that keeps saying "you're going to make a fool of yourself, she won't say yes, and even if she does you'll screw it up somehow!" the problem is I keep listening to the wrong voice! :(