obsidity

The painting class I did today had me and this other girl who is so incredibly beautiful, East Indian with long thick dreads piled up on her head an a perfect body I mean tiny tiny with nice boobs and everything and all the students crowded around her to paint and I had like 2 and I know they were only doing it because there was no room left on the other side.
I tried not to cry about this since it's silly, but I just felt like a big fat white monster next to her. Of course she was also very nice and sweet, so I couldn't hate her either.
On the upside, this girl came in the afternoon and painted me and she drew these amazing clothes that I wish I had lots of belts and filmy stuff and big boots and a snarky smile even though I was not making any face.
and the teacher said that he thought I was inspiring with my pink hair, he was trying to explain to one student how to get out of just pianting realistically and using more imagination and wasn't I like "Venus of the Ice Lake" or something bcse I was so pale and there could be icicles and stuff all around and so that was nice.
I wish I had a copy of that one painting though. It was soooooooo cooooool. Talk about fan art. Except I am nobody.
Tomorrow. Donnie Darko.