obnoxiouspants

another boring day.

but i'm stress levels are getting higher and higher



i may seem like a very outspoken person but in some cases i really don't tell people how i feel about certain things. i really hate confrontations and have had minor panic attacks when faced with one. so i've made it a point to try and let things go.

recently though i've been having to deal with a person who has been really getting under my skin. we've been friends since she moved back to City and she has been fun to hang out with and talk to even though some things she does i don't really approve of.

well over the past months my friends and i have been noticing her really picking up on my mannerisms and such, which is normal when people hang out a lot. but then (this is where it gets kinda silly when i write it) she been starting to braid her own hair in yarn and i even found some photos where she has draw dots with eyeliner on her face like i do.

now i know these are not completely my own new and original concepts, since Chris (the girl who starting doing this to myhair about 3-4 years ago) and i got the hair and make-up ideas from a show called the Tribe and a few Uk sites, but they have become my trademarks in my respective locations. not to mention its how people remember me (from people on the street to band members i've met and hung out with)

i never really got frustrated about these things before, i mean one of my now ex-girlfriends got Chris to braid her hair and i've referred a lot of people to Chris about getting it done. but it's bothering me now because this girl does it herself, it looks like shit (sorry to say honey) and i'm constantly having to hear people in my classes, teachers, and my friends outside of school talk to me about how we look like twins and they confuse us when they see one of us in the hallways or around town.

thats a huge pet peeve of mine: being confused with someone else.
probably one of the little side reasons i make it a point to stand out and be strange

then you have to throw on top of that the fact that i've in a way lost of my best friends to her because they are now "special" freinds and i never get to see him anymore (minus when him and i have went down to towson) or when i do see him during the weeks in nj she is with him. [pout] i miss him...


i dunno... i just feel like someone is trying to be me... and that makes me feel very uncomfortable.


yes this probably will all seem quite silly to some people, childish even. but i just had to let it all out.
yes i should just let it roll off my back, not take it so personally, see it as a form of flattery, or grow up and move on or talk to her about it face to face.

but i hate confrontations...

this might be starting one though... or maybe just making weird silences in some classes. but then again i haven't been talking much lately anyway.


if ya'll read that... yea i just needed to get it out. if you've already heard all that shit before i'm sorry you had to reread it.

gahh.. i'm now in the process of removing most of my yarn cause i've decided to try something new with it: half in half out ^_~