Driving through South Dakota, she'd been explaining to me how someone had recently given her a mix CD with one of the songs from the Mike Doughty album we were listening to. (She had many admirers, and a shelf to keep all the mixes she was given.) The fellow had told her that ths song summed up everything he felt about her. It wasn't the song we were listening to, however. Now it was "You Were The Only Answer", a song I had always liked (and found [a little--maybe just a little...] moving).
I leaned forward to stretch out and she slipped her arm behind me, letting it rest down my back.
"You were the only answer/my plans spun all around you"
Her arm felt warm and comforting pressed between my back and the car seat. We drove that way for a while not saying anything and I felt one of those moments of profound joy--pleasure so deep and intense that it didn't even feel like happiness anymore. My heart pumped a giddy warmth through my body that pulsed through my head and leaked from my eyes in hot tears. Above, my mind swirled, thinking of the preciousness of this moment, her hand on my back, that this is what being alive was like. Thinking of her many admirers, that this trip would be over in in a day, that this, that this moment, can't last. I snuck a look at her through the side of my sunglasses and she turned from watching the patchy brown fields to smile at me. My thoughts spun all sround her.
The feeling ebbed and I wiped my eyes.
"Five years in the wrong, I am assured/my name to you is just another word."
Bright flames dim and epiphanies fade, forgoten. But it's worth it: everything that's happened and will happen. It's all worth it to be here now.
I leaned forward to stretch out and she slipped her arm behind me, letting it rest down my back.
"You were the only answer/my plans spun all around you"
Her arm felt warm and comforting pressed between my back and the car seat. We drove that way for a while not saying anything and I felt one of those moments of profound joy--pleasure so deep and intense that it didn't even feel like happiness anymore. My heart pumped a giddy warmth through my body that pulsed through my head and leaked from my eyes in hot tears. Above, my mind swirled, thinking of the preciousness of this moment, her hand on my back, that this is what being alive was like. Thinking of her many admirers, that this trip would be over in in a day, that this, that this moment, can't last. I snuck a look at her through the side of my sunglasses and she turned from watching the patchy brown fields to smile at me. My thoughts spun all sround her.
The feeling ebbed and I wiped my eyes.
"Five years in the wrong, I am assured/my name to you is just another word."
Bright flames dim and epiphanies fade, forgoten. But it's worth it: everything that's happened and will happen. It's all worth it to be here now.
obelisk:
Eep! That's one hell of a sincere entry. (Not my usual style at all. 
) You know, in retrospect, I'd have to say that I left out some feelings of that moment. While writing it I got pleasantly wrapped up in my thoughts of that girl, but there was also some other stuff going on that time--that weird hopeful/nervous feeling of being at a new point in your life (moving from chicago to portland), the dislocation of being on a long road trip, the pleasure of being on a journey, etc.
) You know, in retrospect, I'd have to say that I left out some feelings of that moment. While writing it I got pleasantly wrapped up in my thoughts of that girl, but there was also some other stuff going on that time--that weird hopeful/nervous feeling of being at a new point in your life (moving from chicago to portland), the dislocation of being on a long road trip, the pleasure of being on a journey, etc. 
nixon:
Not to disturb the profoundness of your entry- but buboes make me laugh. BWHAAAA