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nyxie

Brunswick

Member Since 2007

Followers 12 Following 15

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Thursday Sep 27, 2007

Sep 27, 2007
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Aaaand I'm homesick.

I'll be able to get home soon though. I'm nervous about the trip, as I'll be driving a stick shift (gross) alone (gross) cross country.. with a dog and possibly a cat. Lame.

I'm just so frazzled lately. I literally feel like I'm losing my mind. As in "they locked grandma up in the nuthouse" crazy. My new doctor diagnosed me with fibromyalgia, and put me on some anti depression/anxiety meds, which make it impossible to sleep unless I take the lunesta she prescribed (and gave me samples for). Well, my insurance wants to be cheap and make me take generic ambien- another sleep aid, which I've taken before and it really fucked me up. I won't take it again. It's not the same thing, and it's not approved for long term use. Well Tricare is lame and won't pay for lunesta unless I go through alllll kinda of bull with them and the new doctor.

So I'm waiting on that. And not sleeping in the meantime.

So I'm on a whole cocktail of drugs for pain, depression, and sleeping troubles- JUST like I was in high school And I always promised myself I would never do it again. They made me sick last time and I'm scared out of my mind that it's going to happen again. But- my anxiety was starting to get out of hand again, and I was feeling more depressed every day.. I only hope that these meds don't turn me into the mindless zombie I was in high school. The first sign I get that that's happening I'm going to stop taking them.



Mike leaves in a couple days for Iraq, and I'll be alone in this apartment with no license (because I suck at life) and only like.. 3 friends.

I think my head is going to start spinning and fall off or something. At least the cymbalta has me happy enough to laugh about it if it happens :-p.

Somebody tell me I'm not crazy. And give me something to laugh about smile

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