nymphetamine

haha, nice. if you got selected the bride would be super-jealous no matter what


your myspace page > mine. but mine < yours in terms of cpu usage. that pic browser decided to hog one of the cores in my laptop. but then again that could be safari being the shite browser that is can be sometimes, hah.

stolen alcohol and horror films.....sounds like the best idea right now!

it's complicated. most of the stuff that bothers me has been stuff that has been debated for many years now. at least 1 year for some of the stuff, other stuff goes way back.

im in a weird situation since i know where ill end up if i follow the path that i am on or where i will ned up if i decide otherwise. truth being told i really dont know if im happy with where i am going. i liked the summer job i had [which is the type of job i can get if i keep going on the path thast im on] and like it then but in retrospect i dont really know. i think it's just me being lazy and not wanting to work anymore. yeah thats prolly it.

still i have a good amount of issues that have not been resolved in many years now [damn this hit and run depression that i have] and some other uncertainties. but that is life, you never really know if youve made the right choice. i can justify it all on paper then i end up going "ah shit, we're all in the matrix and life doesn't really matter anyway." but maybe that is october, last october i just didnt care about life at all anymore, it didnt make a lick of difference to me if i just died for some reason. i prolly wouldnt have cared. but now i do actually care about living some more.

it's all just a tough balancing act.

i can summarize with this - the smarter you get the more insane you become. and i know that first hand all too well.

this sunday im going to see sg live with some friends, which is nice. some time off is good.

hope that the wedding isnt too boring.

you made it for the best part. none of the bullshit, all of the free alcohol.

what is odd about the insanity is that from what i have been told, a lot of my relatives are pretty crazy as well. they get older and crazier but still are sharp as can be.

both of my parents are pretty bright people as well and theyve got their share of weirdness/craziness. but mine seems to be a lot bigger. then again i cant get into their minds and make my own judgement.

one other random thought i noticed today inbetween working on various things - i really resemble omen suicide from the sg csi episode. important difference is that my parents really do know about that other side of me [unlike with her]. theyve only known that for anywhere between less than 1 and 2 years depending on how i measure it. what they do know is pretty restricted, i like to keep things hidden. they must never know my long range plans [ie with tattoos - they are not allowed to know stuff that is in the pipeline. it doesn't exist to them until it really is there and i admit it]. but that is something slightly related.

Go forth and kick ass!

im watching a recorded copy of it in HD right now. the detail is amazing on my widescreen monitor.


the episode is just really sad for me. really makes infinity cry watching parts of it.


i wish that i could try and make more of my college years and am really making the most of this semester with a light course load. but from here on out things get harder, which sucks. but it's a tradeoff that i face for the future.

if i ran off and decided to just run off and escape my current life, my parents would probably not be too pleased to say the least and that is not something i want to deal with.

I need excitement too

I am like anti social so when like my best friend cut our ties I was left with like nothing to do ever so I sort of been like a shut in - though T.V is not my posion - piles of rented movies and books.

I think I am going to start getting back into photography - that at lest would force me out of the house

Right on

How can you hate the poor Deftones?

i somehow figured that you were a nautral blonde, dont ask me why but i just thought so.

black and red is probably my favorite color combo, it can look amazing. yes indeed.


nah your journals arent insanse at all. interesting, yes they have.


another thing id like to add is that sometimes you need to really fake it and appeal to authority figures. tell em what they want to hear and exaggerate. makes you look good...if done responsibly. my parents basically got me in a position where if i mess up im...well screwed would be putting it lightly. substantial losses in many ways. so i cant do anything crazy that could potentially cause me to get in trouble at school. but what they dont know about might as well not have happenned in their minds...

Don't debate...relax hon.

owww. one in gym class i got hit on the forehead with a football. but it didnt hurt at all.


then there was the time i almost fell off a pole on the climb up to the zipline. thanks to my sympathetic nervous system i mustered the strength and pulled myself up.


what color is your hair? or shall i say what is the natural color and what is the dyed color?

I'm sorry I missed your tall tales of aputation.

I'll try to comment 8 or 9 times over the next 24 hours to compensate.

i had a keyobard with a space key that over fired once. still got it but its at my parents house and i use that computer once a month tops.


hope that school can get taken care of. it's complicated, hopefully the consequences wont become a major problem. do keep my points from a previous comment in mind.


foot removed? uuuhhhhh check to see im paying attention?

WTF??????????

Single for just over a month for the first time in 2.5 yrs...and no action in 10 months...that predicament

awww...thanks


it doesnt matter what kind of influence you are. you bring change, which is waay more than 90% of others, most stand back and do nothing.


good luck tomorrow!

sorry your wekeend has gone to shit



you got thrown out of school because of that email? if that's true, that is just f-ing ridiculous.

is there some higher authority that you could take this up with [ie dean]? it's pretty clear that the teahcer doesn't give a shit about anything and someone higher up needs to handle this.


if you really did get kicked out of school, your dad is going to be pissed for a while. he needs time to cool off. then you can explain exactly what happened. you must wait and explain calmly and not place blame on everyone. present printouts of email conversations without immediately blaming the teacher or calling her an immature wahtever. cause placing blame gets people to become defensive and in that case you will not win. fighting with defensive parents is futile.

dont blame yourself for this. you've done exactly what you are supposed to do in such a situation.

at this point you need to make an assessment of the situation and follow the appropriate path forward. and remember - perhaps the appropriate path is going to school somewhere else.

try and relax and think about the next move you're going to make.