nymous

This is a moment of personal reflection by proxy of this public space. Forgive me later for breaking my own rules ...later I will post some highfalutin text about the social ramifications of doors or twine or some kind of completely fictional superpower ...and how they effect (affect?) me as a human ...as for now... Autobiographical flatulence.

Today everything I did resembled masturbation, except that act itself (looked more like boredom to me).

I've spent the last two days creating a new website for myself (my old website was my band's website, now it is their website). There's something cold about creating a website for a band (solo project) that doesn't even really exist yet. Completely unrewarding.

I went to work for close to an hour and managed to do that job so well that they don't need me for a few days...hooray for talent, oh ...and contract work.

Then I spent all evening working on my financial aid paperwork and figured out that there is no path leading to school for me this semester ...fuck, then fuck again, then FUCK!!! That's 4 semesters I've attended college since 2000! Fuck that college and their "college of the year" status, they've attained a special mental company with my psoriasis and tummy problems.

For me, the past never passes and I seem to wallow in history like it's my own fucking skin. The big problem is that my skin (metaphorical and real) is rotten in places. I have an unsightly patch of psoriasis around my neck today and if my metaphor about history is accurate then it seems as though history is trying to strangle me.

I want to move also, anywhere ...any suggestions? My life is a blank novel at this point, anything is possible as I have no obligations or responsibilities (or money or transportation) here anymore.

I ate some great BBQ this evening though and caught the first episode of Stargate Atlantis that I had missed, overall a good end to a somewhat numbing day.

My comic books will come in the mail next week and I get to see Sonic Youth this Saturday. Sonic Youth have had a big presence in my musical circuit recently.

FUCK! I'm blogging, quick somebody flash some bright colorful lights at me or something, distract me from this completely disgusting habit ...meh, It's done ...I'm the newest eDisease, a cyber-psycological problem, hello Me.

Here's why I love Elvis Costello...

Cut loose in a nightmare, cast off in my dreams
If home is anywhere that I can hang my hat
Then it's coming apart at the seams
My luck is hanging upside down
I try to hold on tight
But money's rolling out of town
And love slips right out of sight

And these bones, they don't look so good to me
Jokers talk and they all disagree
One day soon, I will laugh right in the face of the poison moon

You look in the mirror
I'm sorry, but it can't be replaced
You're thrown straight out in that cruel parade
Buttoned down and laced
It starts like fascination, it ends up like a trance
You've gotta use your imagination on some of that magazine romance

And these bones--they don't look so good to me
Jokers talk and they all disagree
One day soon, I will laugh right in the face of the poison moon
One day soon, I will laugh right in the face of the poison moon