numbers

I'm in the eye of the storm. I'm feeling worlds better, but also feeling the beginning of what might potentially be the real illness, or just a slight bout of hypochondria. Isn't it amazing though how when you're really sick you can feel one day as if you are on your deathbed, and the next as if you've been reborn? What a great feeling. They're mutually exclusive too. When you're sick you can't visualize or even come close to understanding what you feel like all the time - the illness locks that door. All you know is that it's good. When you feel good, the same goes for the sick feeling, you only know it was shitty.

Where is this going you ask? Well, I've recently had some experience with friends/family battling depression. In the past I've been of the insensitive and ignorant opinion that those battling depression were somehow not fighting it hard enough, and were simply being overly dramatic. Seeing one of the most enlightened and stable people I know fight depression caused me to reassess my opinions on the matter. This distinction between feeling good and bad might be the closest I come to understanding the feeling. I hope anyway.