Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

null

Member Since 2002

Followers 15 Following 15

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Saturday Apr 28, 2007

Apr 28, 2007
2
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
I've been working on eliminating one of my most vexing and counter-intuitive traits. When I've had a lousy day or week, I do something senselessly self-destructive. I eat like shit or don't bathe properly or don't do the things I enjoy or spend too much money.

Last week was almost wholly bad, so I spent today not being self-destructive. I spent today living.

I woke up and promptly went back to sleep. After I finally got up, I showered and scrubbed myself head to toe. I never feel better than when I'm perfectly groomed.

Afterward, I donned an old pair of jeans, a new organic cotton t-shirt, my ancient flip flops, and the ridiculously rock-star Prada sunglasses. I walked to one of my favorite breakfast spots and ordered a vegetarian egg-white omelet. I was seated near a window in the old converted farmhouse and could watch the city starting to get moving. It was a moment of almost pure Zen.

About lunchtime, I caught a matinee of Next. It wasn't a transformative movie, and there were plot holes big enough to drive trucks through. It was still a fun way to spend a couple hours.

The sun was still shining and the day brisk when I left the theater. I grabbed my Reader and wandered to a nearby park to lie in the sun and read. On the way there, I picked up some apples to snack on.

There's something so decadent and perfect to lying outside in the sun, eating fresh fruit, and reading. To me, it's almost pornographic.

I came home and cooked dinner. I made salad with butter leaf and romaine lettuce, sugar snap peas, carrots, and red cabbage. I topped that with some exemplary blue cheese and bacon dressing. I whipped up a quick Caesar twice-baked potato and pan-seared a dry-aged ribeye in fresh butter. I was short of grey salt for the meat but the black salt did me nearly as well.

I watched Anthony Bourdain: No Reservation filmed in the Pacific Northwest while I ate my dessert of fresh Madagascar vanilla bean ice cream. I cried a little as he waxed poetic about Salumi in Pioneer Square.

Now, I'm drinking a bottle of a Japanese sports drink that I took a cotton to years ago, Pocari Sweat. I'm listening to Tom Petty. I'm writing a little.

And I've decided that this is much better than being self-destructive. Throughout the day, I felt happy and at peace. All the walking felt great. My huge body started to move like I expect it to. I felt tall and strong and straight of limb in a way that I love.

Here's to life.

More Blogs

  • 10.23.06
    4

    Monday Oct 23, 2006

    Chapter 10,813: In which our hero almost passes out in an airplane b…
  • 10.17.06
    1

    Tuesday Oct 17, 2006

    I completely forgot I had a Yahoo! email address. Well, that's not e…
  • 10.11.06
    0

    Wednesday Oct 11, 2006

    I neither interview nor mope well. The two are often hideously relat…
  • 10.09.06
    1

    Monday Oct 09, 2006

    Quite often my dreams are of blood and fire and grace. They resemble…
  • 10.08.06
    0

    Sunday Oct 08, 2006

    Through the sort of diligent and pointless research that I do when I'…
  • 10.04.06
    2

    Wednesday Oct 04, 2006

    I added a new Apple Cinema display to my desk to replace the venerabl…
  • 10.02.06
    2

    Tuesday Oct 03, 2006

    Up early. Chores done. Breakfast consumed. Today will be a good da…
  • 10.01.06
    1

    Sunday Oct 01, 2006

    Spent the afternoon planning on doing something...I suppose ridiculou…
  • 09.27.06
    4

    Wednesday Sep 27, 2006

    Speaking with my boy, the PizzaMan last night, I said something I rea…
  • 09.26.06
    1

    Tuesday Sep 26, 2006

    Quiet music and black thoughts are not the way to spend an evening. …

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
10
months
10
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,598 SuicideGirls
  • 1,115,326 followers
  • 14,940,060 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,443,254 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo