Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

null

Member Since 2002

Followers 15 Following 15

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Saturday Apr 28, 2007

Apr 28, 2007
2
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
I've been working on eliminating one of my most vexing and counter-intuitive traits. When I've had a lousy day or week, I do something senselessly self-destructive. I eat like shit or don't bathe properly or don't do the things I enjoy or spend too much money.

Last week was almost wholly bad, so I spent today not being self-destructive. I spent today living.

I woke up and promptly went back to sleep. After I finally got up, I showered and scrubbed myself head to toe. I never feel better than when I'm perfectly groomed.

Afterward, I donned an old pair of jeans, a new organic cotton t-shirt, my ancient flip flops, and the ridiculously rock-star Prada sunglasses. I walked to one of my favorite breakfast spots and ordered a vegetarian egg-white omelet. I was seated near a window in the old converted farmhouse and could watch the city starting to get moving. It was a moment of almost pure Zen.

About lunchtime, I caught a matinee of Next. It wasn't a transformative movie, and there were plot holes big enough to drive trucks through. It was still a fun way to spend a couple hours.

The sun was still shining and the day brisk when I left the theater. I grabbed my Reader and wandered to a nearby park to lie in the sun and read. On the way there, I picked up some apples to snack on.

There's something so decadent and perfect to lying outside in the sun, eating fresh fruit, and reading. To me, it's almost pornographic.

I came home and cooked dinner. I made salad with butter leaf and romaine lettuce, sugar snap peas, carrots, and red cabbage. I topped that with some exemplary blue cheese and bacon dressing. I whipped up a quick Caesar twice-baked potato and pan-seared a dry-aged ribeye in fresh butter. I was short of grey salt for the meat but the black salt did me nearly as well.

I watched Anthony Bourdain: No Reservation filmed in the Pacific Northwest while I ate my dessert of fresh Madagascar vanilla bean ice cream. I cried a little as he waxed poetic about Salumi in Pioneer Square.

Now, I'm drinking a bottle of a Japanese sports drink that I took a cotton to years ago, Pocari Sweat. I'm listening to Tom Petty. I'm writing a little.

And I've decided that this is much better than being self-destructive. Throughout the day, I felt happy and at peace. All the walking felt great. My huge body started to move like I expect it to. I felt tall and strong and straight of limb in a way that I love.

Here's to life.

More Blogs

  • 04.28.07
    0

    Saturday Apr 28, 2007

    I've been working on eliminating one of my most vexing and counter-in…
  • 04.27.07
    3

    Friday Apr 27, 2007

    I find myself quietly singing "You Can't Always Get What You Want". …
  • 04.08.07
    3

    Sunday Apr 08, 2007

    After some dithering and chivvying, I decided to buzz down to Portlan…
  • 03.30.07
    0

    Friday Mar 30, 2007

    My heart is quiet, my mind languid.
  • 03.16.07
    3

    Friday Mar 16, 2007

    What more can you say about a birthday that starts with breakfast at …
  • 03.13.07
    0

    Wednesday Mar 14, 2007

    In a French cafe in Harajuku this afternoon, I ordered food from a Ja…
  • 03.11.07
    1

    Monday Mar 12, 2007

    We walked into the hotel room, and my first thought was, "Oh no, ther…
  • 03.04.07
    0

    Sunday Mar 04, 2007

    I spent a quietly civilized weekend. I've missed being quietly civil…
  • 02.21.07
    1

    Wednesday Feb 21, 2007

    In the past week, I've left several hundred dollars in cash, a checkb…
  • 02.11.07
    1

    Sunday Feb 11, 2007

    I woke up groggy, thinking, "I was going to do something this morning…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
9
months
14
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,593 SuicideGirls
  • 1,119,176 followers
  • 14,924,007 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,401,627 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo