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nucpro_gmac

Virginia

Member Since 2003

Followers 12 Following 40

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Wednesday Sep 07, 2005

Sep 7, 2005
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I Guess its time for the quarterly update, Late for that too, whats new.
On the successes, I haven't been late for work since April 8, and no sick days taken for 18 months. Sad that it has to be a measure of my quality but it is. No one remembers that you did a great job protecting the health and safety of the public when you were 5 minutes late for work, causing 15 minutes of overtime and inconveniencing the poor bastard thats been there all night just waiting for me to get there early. WHATEVER. Get Over It.

More importantly, I grieve. I feel loss. I Love my little girl and want her to be happy and become the mother of our children and I felt bad for not being over-joyed when I found out she was pregnant. Happy, yes, but we had been through this before. We Lost the baby again frown mad confused frown
This is why I was cautious and supportive not telling every one, I understand that its hard to hide falling asleep in the middle of the day and suddenly wearing only the clothes that hide the weight gain. I am happy to help. But I am cautiously anticipating week 12 visit to tell us that all is well and our chances are better than average. That didn't happen, We went to the ER and No heartbeat. . . How can I tell her that it will be all right when I know it isn't I know that the baby inside her really is dead and has been for days mad frown worse still that this suffering and dought and fear will continue through the night and the next day and night until the kind and knowing OB-Gyn can 1 see us then 2 schedule us for surgery.

I cannot fathom the feeling of knowing that our once living baby loved by her and I was dead inside of her and she had to know that and wait until they could get it out and make her back to normal.

I grieve. I feel loss. I am sympathetic.

I have Hope.

surreal
Hope, strength, peace,

Gmac
dirtyprettything:
i lost a baby once. it was the most terrible thing in my life. many many hugs to you, and i hope you and your lady make it through okay.

hang in there.
Sep 7, 2005

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