Got a jar of shine....
Because FUCK IT THAT'S WHY. only 7 and is half gone. I hate this shit. Can't I just win? Shit i have work tommorow. Joy and fucking rapture. I need to get my life together. I've been getting my shit together. I need to get out of here before i lose it. I'd think those letters meant something. That all those hours meant somthing. That after all that shit about me not asking you to leave your husband youd keep me and do it. I have patience. Shit i have enough patience to lay prone on a hot day covered by a tarp with one eye pearing through a scope so I can get a paycheck for making groundhogs into meat jelly. But this? I'll be damned if it has been tested. I hate flying solo. I hate it when people just give up. Goddamnit I want to give up but I can't, I never could, and I'm not about to fucking start.
Why can't I find a girl who loves guns, camping, and doesnt change for anyone? Why does it always have to turn around and bite me in the ass. Fuck it.
From now until I can get my ass back to school. From now until i can find someone who wont give up just for the sheer sake of giving up when it seems hopeless. I will improve. I will crawl back from the deepest bloodiest pits of hell. I will succeed.
never giving up. never surrendering. even though....
everyday is exactly the same...