Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

nonchalance

United Kingdom

Member Since 2003

Followers 26 Following 26

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Saturday Nov 06, 2004

Nov 5, 2004
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
I'm in a job that is good. I feel like i'm standing still for the first time in my life, yet to find my legs, put down roots, that kind of thing.

Now its happening it's both comforting and scary as hell. I have never been one to just sit, i always feel guilty if i'm not doing something. Be it working, worrying or just reading. Yes, i am a voracious reader for reasons of distraction.
Silence doesn't scare me, neither does solitude, but being inert does, i guess that's why i've got a tattoo saying 'Anxiety is Freedom', i'd rather be thinking or doing.
Security is seductive as the more you get, the more you fear losing it, thats why revolutions are predominantly said to be performed by the disposessed, if you have nothing to lose, you are capable of anything.

I don't want to lose that feeling. I should really embrace my new self, it's just that the whole process of settling is new to me, and leading a life with less anxiety is something i am not accustomed to.

My current reading list:






blush Sorry for the randomness, i just am doing the self concious thing. blush

Edit----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I just found a song that today at least, in the words of Nigel Tufnel makes 'people weep instantly' - On Some Faraway Beach by Brian Eno. Imagine The Flaming Lips, but less tongue in cheek. The first line is "Every chance, i'll die like a baby." It just does somethign to me.

This is the first day in a very long time i've actually felt up to writing to people on SG, i don't know why, maybe i'm a misanthrope, but its really fucking difficult to have something to say sometimes. Sorry everyone.
blush I wish i could be more 'give' and less 'recieve' .
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
october:
last night was so good, and waking up next to you this morning made me smile all day. thank you.
Nov 10, 2004
kinto:
So we're growing up, eh?

That's a good feeling.

In other news I wish I could find some time to read more... Time is flying & this year 2004 has been very, well... interesting so far. A crazy rollercoaster of emotions - hard to stay level-headed when absolutely nothing remotely easy happens to you in the love department... but I'll never regret any single minute.

Take care good man
Nov 10, 2004

More Blogs

  • 11.28.04
    2

    Sunday Nov 28, 2004

    Read More
  • 11.20.04
    5

    Sunday Nov 21, 2004

    Study study study Study study study Study study study Study study stu…
  • 11.13.04
    3

    Saturday Nov 13, 2004

    Read More
  • 11.05.04
    9

    Saturday Nov 06, 2004

    I'm in a job that is good. I feel like i'm standing still for the fir…
  • 11.03.04
    5

    Wednesday Nov 03, 2004

    Bush has won, and i'm laughing???? Probably because this confirms …
  • 10.30.04
    5

    Saturday Oct 30, 2004

    Read More
  • 10.28.04
    11

    Thursday Oct 28, 2004

    Thursday already?? I'm on the way to becoming a social worker, …
  • 10.25.04
    7

    Monday Oct 25, 2004

    Today: I feel a) Ill. b) Tired. c) Stupid. I have a) Ea…
  • 10.17.04
    13

    Sunday Oct 17, 2004

    Life is inspiring at the moment, seeing October all weekend and Yann …
  • 10.10.04
    10

    Sunday Oct 10, 2004

    Mmmm, an interesting week! Things are finally moving, it looks li…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
9
months
9
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,593 SuicideGirls
  • 1,120,514 followers
  • 14,920,612 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,392,861 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo