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nolan_void

Splitsville, daddio

Member Since 2004

Followers 22 Following 38

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Monday Jan 24, 2005

Jan 24, 2005
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I'm dropping my math class today. I respect it as a discipline but it is just not my language.

worship
1 : to honor or reverence as a divine being or supernatural power
2 : to regard with great or extravagant respect, honor, or devotion

Last night I was (here we are about to get into one of the biggest and stupidest discrepancies in the English language between "lie" and "lay" so I'll make it simple) in bed thinking about the nature of worship. I came to realize that the only force, entity, or collective form that I worship with a true and honest devotion is woman. As an avatar of the divine principle of romantic love incarnate, I find that there is no god or spirit or ideal that I find any more compelling than the being that is my complement. I often feel that my level of spiritual involvement in making love is just too deep and powerful for most people my age though, who seem to view it as just something to do kill the numbness of life, just another drug to anesthetize the pain that they feel is existence. Perhaps this is insecurity on my part or, even more likely, pride, but when I think of being with someone else it is not just an act of lust (though the lust is definitely there) but it is also an act of union, of losing myself in experience the warmth of another burning flame.
cavatica:
I don't see any other way it could possibly be. People who use sex as a weapon, or who fling it around like a fifty cent cracker jax toy, and think there won't be consequences because, oh, they're just not attached to it that much--in MY experience--always end up getting burned the worst. And then they can't figure out why.
Jan 24, 2005
mtlqueen:
In regards to your sweet compliment, thank you. I don't feel very creative most of the time, even though I understand it isn't a tap I just turn off when I need to rest... damn dripping kept me up all night last night! wink
Reading your journal today makes me feel a bit heavy, because I have always had a very polarized relationship to sex. It makes me think you won't have very many 22 year olds over who are ready to experience what you're describing. But you know what, that's okay. It's all about quality control.
Jan 24, 2005

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