fascinating turn of events....
1. I get to keep my driver's license and I don't have to go in-patient for evaluation or change my meds.
2. I'm number one in the office by the numbers right now. this is a put up or shut up business and let me just say that, well, I fucking put up.
3. however, I've got some of the most impressively bad accounts imaginable. the girl next to me and I have decided we're now vice city because our customers are just fucking crooks. I had a pretty good one who managed to get his vehicle seized in a drug raid after getting after 60 days past due, and she trumped me with a first pay default who pulled of the same stunt-- IMPRESSIVE! but today I figured out that one of my guys who has skipped the state gave us an alias social security number. wait wait-- just let that sink in a second: ALIAS SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER.
4. (sigh)
5. I have procrastinated on filing my police report and I am planning on going tonight... blah.
6. oh, and I was going about the whole deleting my livejournal account and I found out that my new xxfridayfive mod crapped out on me. so I guess I'm the moderator of a dirty livejournal community still. go answer questions.
7. sometimes when two people love each other it isn't all sunshine and rainbows but it's still very beautiful and the love is still very much there.
8. sometimes the people who should understand the most are the cruelest and most dismissive. sometimes they even think they understand completely. sometimes I want to react violently.
9. one day, if I'm ever able, I want to throw a black tie affair for all of my doctors. ice sculptures and all. I think it would be fantastic to have a toast over orange juice to doctors tolia and chandra, and then I could make a joke about how they saved my life, ensuring hundreds of billable hours for the rest of my doctors and they could all laugh.
10. please please please give me some goddamn credit for how hard I am working on just fucking making it through the seconds of the minutes of the hours of the days because so often I struggle with overwhelming depression, frustration, and rage that I can't even begin to express-- so overwhelming I have developed a jealousy of the catatonic in their sheer strength of will and determination. but you're not who I'm really begging...
edit: I'm okay sometimes heartbreak just comes in the rarest forms and mourning doesn't work out the way it's supposed to.
1. I get to keep my driver's license and I don't have to go in-patient for evaluation or change my meds.
2. I'm number one in the office by the numbers right now. this is a put up or shut up business and let me just say that, well, I fucking put up.
3. however, I've got some of the most impressively bad accounts imaginable. the girl next to me and I have decided we're now vice city because our customers are just fucking crooks. I had a pretty good one who managed to get his vehicle seized in a drug raid after getting after 60 days past due, and she trumped me with a first pay default who pulled of the same stunt-- IMPRESSIVE! but today I figured out that one of my guys who has skipped the state gave us an alias social security number. wait wait-- just let that sink in a second: ALIAS SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER.
4. (sigh)
5. I have procrastinated on filing my police report and I am planning on going tonight... blah.
6. oh, and I was going about the whole deleting my livejournal account and I found out that my new xxfridayfive mod crapped out on me. so I guess I'm the moderator of a dirty livejournal community still. go answer questions.
7. sometimes when two people love each other it isn't all sunshine and rainbows but it's still very beautiful and the love is still very much there.
8. sometimes the people who should understand the most are the cruelest and most dismissive. sometimes they even think they understand completely. sometimes I want to react violently.
9. one day, if I'm ever able, I want to throw a black tie affair for all of my doctors. ice sculptures and all. I think it would be fantastic to have a toast over orange juice to doctors tolia and chandra, and then I could make a joke about how they saved my life, ensuring hundreds of billable hours for the rest of my doctors and they could all laugh.
10. please please please give me some goddamn credit for how hard I am working on just fucking making it through the seconds of the minutes of the hours of the days because so often I struggle with overwhelming depression, frustration, and rage that I can't even begin to express-- so overwhelming I have developed a jealousy of the catatonic in their sheer strength of will and determination. but you're not who I'm really begging...
edit: I'm okay sometimes heartbreak just comes in the rarest forms and mourning doesn't work out the way it's supposed to.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
ladylovelybrit:
thank-you for the postcard missy!!! 
one2frog:
You have got a lot going on in your life. Take good care of yourself.