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nirbhao

Member Since 2006

Followers 56 Following 70

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Thursday Jun 15, 2006

Jun 15, 2006
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I'm going to an engagement party for a friend today. they've been together for several years and had a luke-warm relationship the entire time. they were on the verge of break-up shortly before the engagement. when I heard about the proposal (during the fight), I was disappointed. further disappointed that she accepted.

it's stuff like this that makes me wonder why I can't just be happy for people.

I guess I'm just a bitch.

I browsed the Suicide Boys photosets for a bit today. some of them are pretty intense. some of them are quite artistic. they are certainly very penis-centered.

I don't really care for penises. they serve a purpose, but I don't care to look at them.

I like looking at pictures of women far better.

I think I need to make an effort to have my next partner be a woman. I've always been one of those "look at the soul before the gentials" type of bisexuals, but it tends to land me with men more than women, I think because it's more socially acceptable. and I've always made the excuse that I've never really had a lasting relationship with a woman because we're crazier and men are dumber and it's easier to put up with dumb than crazy, but really we're all just people with varying degrees of dumb and crazy.

and as far as relationships go in the first place, even though I'm not officially on any kind of dating hiatus, I really am not in a good place to be in a relationship. I'm all mopey and unemployed. I've got plenty of shit to work through, and I don't need to be taking that out on anyone, male, female, or otherwise.

my body wants sex so bad, though. it's a bad thing when the body and mind are in disagreeance on an issue like picking up on potential booty. I have Fly on the Windscreen on a mix CD in my car, and it gets me feeling all sexy like I could drop anyone with a stare.

I have to remind myself that I am no longer the dark, smoldering girl in the full-length leather skirt who once stopped traffic on a five-lane road.

oh! speaking of Martin Gore, I can still be a queer girl and lust after him. straight boys crush on him, so I can, too.



Death is everywhere
The more I look
The more I see
The more I feel
A sense of urgency
Tonight

Come here
Touch me
Kiss me
Touch me
Now
Touch me
Touch me
Now


lyrics courtesy of depechemode.com

VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
mistressmissy:
your journals are entertaining. I like girls but could never see myself having a relationship with one. we are quite crazy. I also don't think peni are beautiful. I like hip bones and belly buttons.
Jun 15, 2006
ojaeflo:
I peruse SB every now and then to size up the competition.
I am so putting those dudes to shame.
bok

And I don't think you'ure a bitch for calling out a loveless relationship when you see it.

And you totally got it going on, girl, so fucking work it.
It's the summer, so enjoy it.
love
Jun 15, 2006

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