nimhly

I'm doing ok. It just really hurt because Mom and Dad both said some really hurtful things, including "I never thought I'd see the day my daughter was living like a piece of shit, and "you could've been so much better than this" and " just quite your bawling". I mean, I guess 1) they dont' understand what it' slike to have a problem in their head that there's nothing they can do about. or maybe they do understand but don't remember. I try so hard in everything to be what they want me to be, but sometimes i lie to them just so they will be proud and also so they get off my back sometimes. It sometimes seem like they take my accomplishments in stride, and concentrate on the bad things. I think i count on them too much and i have to take things into my own hands. I'm still hurting a lot because what they said to me was too close to what i was worried they'd say. i actually do really like my apartment, and everyone else does too. i mean, it's not mucyh to look at now, especially since you guys are used to living in really nice places, but it's got a lot of potential with the things i'm going to do with it. i can't stand living in a four wall box of white walls. it's oppressive. it hurts. things in my life are actually looking up a little bit now, it feels like a new start from the bad vibes in my old place. a LOT of shitty stuff happened there. this place feels like a breath of fresh air.