nikonphoto80

First off I would like to say hi to my friend violently
She was the first one to ask for one of my BFA art cards and she went and looked at my art and she wasnt even on my friends list till the next day. I would also like to say hi to the only other person to ask for an art card Valkyrie Who I hope to see again at poisons pool party.

Some of you might think it is a little strange that I get so sad when one of my SG friends are mad at me or go gray the reason is that I dont talk to very many people on a regular basis any more not like talking on the phone or emailing or meeting on purpose I know a fuck ton of people but there only people I talk to when I run into them at the bar or at Wal-Mart but on SG there are people I talk to 2 or 3 times a week and other I talk to once a week and some every two weeks point is that I talk to you guys more than I do the friends in the real world so I fell closer to a lot of you than I do a lot of people in my own town.

I really wish people wouldnt get mad at me most of the time I never know what I did and most of the time I never find out, I also wish that if for some reason one of my friends decides they dont want to talk to me any more they would tell me that they dont want to talk to me any more and tell me why, it kills me so bad to try to call some one I care about or send them text messages and they dont every return my messages any more the most resent case of this was form this girl that I really liked and I kind of thought she felt the same way but we havent spoken in two weeks so my last text I told her I wanted her to be happy and If not talking to me does that than so be It good by and that I would miss her.

I watched Gangs Of New York again tonight I love that move even if it is long it shows that no man is all good and most are not all evil we all have our faults, it also makes me said most of all the end.

Well the last thing Im going to say is there are a couple of songs out there that helped to push my art in the direction it has gone in most of all is this one song the hole CD is good and pushed me a little but this one song pushed me hard it is also where my mind set is right now so pleas read the lyrics to this song and see it you can tell me who sang it what the name of the song is and what CD it came form.


Here I sit and wait throughout my days
Waiting for something, for my spirit to ascend
Its not that I so badly want to die
But at these times I struggle for desire to live

Each day it grows worse than the last
Function divorced from my body
As Saturns shadow falls across my soul
Im powerless, until its passed

And Im trying to find a way
Out of the blackness of this tunnel at the end of the light
And Im dreaming forever of the day
Dreaming of a time when life wont be this way

Webs invisible bind my spirit
In bondage to a force unseen
Like a candle, this gift my life
It burns away, it burns away

Until nights end sleep will not come to me
Then come restless, fitful dreams
Eternal slumber calls me to her arms
After Im dead, will I still dream?

Sometimes I dream that Im alive
Under the stars, under the sky
Then I awaken paralyzed to another day I cannot face
And Im trying, Im dreaming forever of the day
Dreaming of a time when life wont be this way.