Ok boys. I don't mind drunken wrestling, or any wrestling for that matter. Tickle fights and multiple person pile ups are cool with me. But you cannot wrestle a girl like a guy. They are delicate. Don't jab me in the ribs. Don't twist my ankles, wrists and toes until I pound the floor and they feel like they're going to break. (I'm going to give in right away). And you definitely cannot plow me in the stomache with a football tackle manouever. I am so bruised this morning.
Plus, boys. When I decline all advances your friend makes on me for a YEAR and make it clear to him that nothing is going to happen between us, not because there is anything wrong with him, but because 1) I'm not feelin him and 2) I am making a valiant attempt to be single... mind pause for run-on sentence...that does not automatically mean that I am now up for grabs for all of you to try 'n fuck me. I just told you I didn't want to fuck anybody. Or do you have selective hearing? And c'mon, I have enough respect for your friend to resist you.
Yes, I know you will only listen to the parts you like to hear. Um, and I know I am also being a jerk by continuing to hang out with you all despite knowing this is an evil tease. But I do it because I believe plutonic friendships are possible, even though the entire male race does not. Watching you struggle with dealing with the fact that girls do sit there in denial of your raging, brain numbing testosterone is kind of amusing also.
Hehe.
And today I will lie in bed all day listening to music and watching the Itallian Villa DVD. Just me 'n my piles of blankets.