Strange story for the day: First of all, let me start by saying that I can't fucking stand Tom Green, Johnny Knoxville or anyone else that finds humor in randomly ambushing people with obscene/offensive behavior. I find it a bit too juvenile for my liking.
So...on to the story. I walk down to the local library branch three times a week or so. It's helped me lose quite a bit of weight without having to change my diet much. As I was returning from the library today, someone comes running up from behind me and immediately falls into step with me once he gets beside me. He asks what I'm doing and I curtly tell him "Walking." He then starts questioning me on whether or not I like sports. Wanting to ignore him and get him to leave, I tell him no, but he persists and says that his "favorite part of sports is when the coach or other teammates slap a player on the ass congratulating them." I say that's nice and keep walking, noticing the microphone pinned to his shirt. He then says he wants to slap my ass and asks if I would let him. I ignore him and he then asks if I would slap his. "I want you to slap my ass till it's pink. Then spread my cheeks and kiss and blow air into my bunghole." I turned up the volume on my discman and kept walking. "I'm gonna grab your ass anyway" and he rreaches toward my ass. I paused momentarily and drew his gaze to my clenched fist. "You better not," I said as I glared at him and continued walking. After a few steps he began to fade back, presumably to find another unsuspecting victim. Which is odd considering this is the middle of suburbia and there aren't many pedestrians at all.
I'm far from a violent person, but I was ready to deck him. If he'd have touched me, even if it was a tap on the shoulder, I would have. I wanted to tell him that behavior like that is a great way to promote homophobia, something that definitely doesn't need promoting in Missouri. I wanted to tell him something outrageous like I enjoy shoving metal tubes up complete stranger's rectums and filling it with boiling hot wax. But I said/did none of those things. I sure as hell didn't want to give him any material for whatever the hell he was doing (I didn't bother looking around to see if there was a camera).
The whole experience was a bit unsettling. For all I knew the guy was nuts. And the fact that he walked beside for 2-300 yards didn't help. I saw the microphone, but that really didn't make things any less disturbing.
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Quote of the day:
"The further I get from the things that I care about, the less that I care about how much further away I get."
--The Cure "Fear of Ghosts"
So...on to the story. I walk down to the local library branch three times a week or so. It's helped me lose quite a bit of weight without having to change my diet much. As I was returning from the library today, someone comes running up from behind me and immediately falls into step with me once he gets beside me. He asks what I'm doing and I curtly tell him "Walking." He then starts questioning me on whether or not I like sports. Wanting to ignore him and get him to leave, I tell him no, but he persists and says that his "favorite part of sports is when the coach or other teammates slap a player on the ass congratulating them." I say that's nice and keep walking, noticing the microphone pinned to his shirt. He then says he wants to slap my ass and asks if I would let him. I ignore him and he then asks if I would slap his. "I want you to slap my ass till it's pink. Then spread my cheeks and kiss and blow air into my bunghole." I turned up the volume on my discman and kept walking. "I'm gonna grab your ass anyway" and he rreaches toward my ass. I paused momentarily and drew his gaze to my clenched fist. "You better not," I said as I glared at him and continued walking. After a few steps he began to fade back, presumably to find another unsuspecting victim. Which is odd considering this is the middle of suburbia and there aren't many pedestrians at all.
I'm far from a violent person, but I was ready to deck him. If he'd have touched me, even if it was a tap on the shoulder, I would have. I wanted to tell him that behavior like that is a great way to promote homophobia, something that definitely doesn't need promoting in Missouri. I wanted to tell him something outrageous like I enjoy shoving metal tubes up complete stranger's rectums and filling it with boiling hot wax. But I said/did none of those things. I sure as hell didn't want to give him any material for whatever the hell he was doing (I didn't bother looking around to see if there was a camera).
The whole experience was a bit unsettling. For all I knew the guy was nuts. And the fact that he walked beside for 2-300 yards didn't help. I saw the microphone, but that really didn't make things any less disturbing.
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Quote of the day:
"The further I get from the things that I care about, the less that I care about how much further away I get."
--The Cure "Fear of Ghosts"
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
I like the animation ('avatar'?) Where do you go for yours?
And how do you download them so they work? I just get a collection of still frames. Duh!