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niero

Member Since 2008

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Wednesday Jan 26, 2011

Jan 26, 2011
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The discovery of a revelation (is that redundant?) for someone, as illustrated below, brings to mind ideas for the true meaning of Christmas:

"Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas. . . perhaps. . . means a little bit more!"

Dr. Seuss (How the Grinch Stole Christmas!)



This is a common misconception. Here we have a Grinch, just going about his business trying to shit on Christmas. And through his misadventures he learns that hes misunderstood the holiday season. But hes been tricked. Hes been lied to and manipulated by the plotting of a devious band of brigands disguised as children. Hes been lead down a dark path, thinking that maybe, just maybe, Christmas is about celebrating family and friends, and being with the ones you love. This, of course, is all bullshit. Christmas is good and decent celebration of the Pillar of Economic Stability the Consumer. The Consumer is, in point of fact, a true American hero. Where would we be without him/her? Where would we be right now without this blessed and wholesome Defender of Liberty? Ill tell you where. In a rat-infested sewer filled with orphans, eating scraps out of the garbage, trying desperately to avoid roving packs of wild dogs, pumas, and communists. Thats where! Yes, this national defender is the only thing standing between us and the eventual breakdown of society. If it werent for the generous, selfless spending, and especially the tithing to so many large corporations that they do during the holidays, we would fall into despair. It is this singular, humble, lone, everyday joe/jane that upholds the economic stability of this country.

And sadly, the story of the Grinch is merely an example of psychotic, God-hating, left-wing baby killers attempting to undermine capitalism, and subvert the American Way. It is a communist-sympathizing attack on democracy! So, to celebrate the spirit of the holidays, remember to ignore your family, punch your friends, and spend lots of money on absurd things you dont need. Or the communists will eat your children.



Thank you, and good night,

NS
yarl:
Katy Perry and the Pixies are coming to MN in the spring!
Jan 26, 2011

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